Is Anyone Straight Anymore?
by LazyPianist
Summary: Jonathan and Jace have been friends for years. One night Jonathan has a romantic dream about Jace and his feelings change for his best friend. How will this affect their friendship?
1. Chapter 1

**Pairing: Jonathan & Jace.**

**Most of the story is in Jonathan's POV.**

**This is M rated because there will be sexual content in later chapters and there's also some swearing.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own The Mortal Instruments.**

* * *

><p>"You wanna see which one can run faster to your house? I bet I can," Jace says, panting slightly. He's always so overconfident.<p>

My best friend Jace and I are jogging outside. It's evening and the streetlights are illuminating the road.

"Oh, so you wanna bet?" I grin at him.

"Yes. Now, let's see…" He gets a thoughtful look on his face. Then his face lights up. "I get it! The one who loses has to give the other one a massage. My muscles are killing me, so I could really use one," he says and rolls his shoulders.

"What makes you think you're going to win? And why don't you ask your girlfriend to give you a massage?" Jace always has a 'girlfriend'. He never dates them longer than a month. He's currently dating my sister's friend, Aline.

"She's awful at it. She once tried to give me one and it felt like she was torturing me. And of course I'm going to win." He smirks at me arrogantly.

I start to run as fast as I can to my house and hear Jace yelling behind me.

"We were supposed to start running at the same time!" he yells as he's almost approaching me.

"Says who?!" I yell over my shoulder. I continue running and soon see my house. I pick up my speed and race for it. I can hear Jace's footsteps behind me, but I know I'm going to win. And I do as I reach the house, Jace coming right behind me. We're both out of breath and Jace is not looking happy.

"You cheated! You didn't actually win."

"If you thought you were gonna be so much faster runner than me, then you should have been able to catch me," I reason.

"Whatever. Let's just get this over with," Jace says and we walk inside. We go to my room upstairs. We're both sweaty and should shower, but we decide to do that later.

"Take off your shirt," Jace commands. I grin a him.

"So eager of getting me naked?" I tease.

"Ha ha. You're so funny," he says sarcastically. I take my shirt off and go lie down on my bed. I lie on my stomach and Jace sits beside me.

Soon I feel his strong hands on my bare back, rubbing with just the right amount of pressure. It feels so good on my sore muscles. He moves to my shoulders. He's so good.

"If I knew you were gonna be this good, I would've asked you to massage me before," I say.

"You shouldn't be so surprised. After all, I am good at pretty much everything." I roll my eyes. "And I just decided that since you cheated, you're going to have to massage me too." His hands are now massaging my lower back.

"You decided?"

"Yes. Now it's your turn," he says and his hands leave my back.

"That's it?"

"That's all you're gonna get since you cheated." He lies down on the bed. I sigh. He can be so annoying sometimes.

I start by massaging his shoulders where I know he needs it the most. Right away I hear him release a satisfied groan.

"Yes. Right there," he groans.

"Aren't you only supposed to make those kinds of noises when you're having sex?" I ask amused.

"Shut up," he growls.

I massage him from the same places and the same amount of time as he massaged me. He's making those same satisfied noises and they're making me feel amused and something more that I really don't even want to acknowledge.

"Okay. Done," I say and get up from the bed.

"No, just a little bit more," Jace pleads, sitting on the bed.

"Nope. It's already getting late and we have school tomorrow. Plus, I think you enjoyed it a little too much." I smirk at him.

"Shut up!" he snaps at me. He puts his shirt back on and walks to the door. "I'll see you tomorrow." Thankfully he doesn't look mad anymore.

"See you," I say and give him a short wave. He smiles and walks out the door. I shower and then go to sleep. The sleep comes fast as I'm so tired from the running. Also, Jace's massage made me really relaxed.

* * *

><p><em>I wake up when I feel someone stroking my cheek gently. It feels so good and makes me feel so peaceful that I can't bring myself to open my eyes. I smile sleepily, still not opening my eyes.<em>

"_Jonathan, I know you're awake. Open your eyes," a male voice says softly. No, it can't be… I slowly open my eyes and like I expected, I see the golden eyes of my best friend._

"_Jace?" I ask confused. "What are you doing here?"_

_He's sitting on my bed, smiling at me and softly stroking the white hair away from my eyes. His touch feels amazing. It's weird. It has never felt like that before. He continues to stroke my hair and my eyes flutter shut slowly._

"_You look so beautiful, Jonathan," he says and I frown. What is going on? Why is he acting like this?_

_He strokes my forehead, trying to smooth away the frown. I start to feel so peaceful again that I can't make myself to care what's happening. I just want to feel his calming touch on my skin._

_I still have my eyes closed, but I won't let myself fall asleep. I want to enjoy this moment as long as it lasts. Suddenly I feel his breath on my face. He cups my face with his hands. My heart starts to beat faster. I know what's going to happen next, but I can't bring myself to stop it. I don't want to stop it._

_Then I feel it. His lips brush softly against mine. Then he presses them with more pressure and starts to kiss me passionately. I tangle my fingers in his golden curls. I feel his body pressed against mine. Everything feels so good and right. I never want it to stop._

_He starts to slow down the kisses and then presses two soft pecks. He pulls away and I open my eyes. He's smiling at me._

"_That was amazing, Jonathan. You're amazing."_

I swiftly open my eyes and sit up. I glance around the dark room and thankfully don't see Jace. What the hell was that? Why do I suddenly have a romantic dream about my best friend? What's wrong with me? It better not be because of that damn massage and those noises he was making.

The clock on my nightstand is showing the numbers 2:28 a.m. I go back to lie down and close my eyes, but the sleep won't come. I'm too disturbed by the dream. I try and try, but the images of the dream won't leave my mind and I can't sleep.

His golden eyes full of love. His unbelievably calming touch. His lips on mine. His body pressed against me. How good it felt.

After few hours I fall asleep to a dreamless sleep. Unfortunately I wake up way too soon to a familiar, yet quite annoying voice. But I guess every noise is annoying when you have barely slept three hours.

"Jonathan, wake up! Jace is here!" my little sister Clary yells at me and I bolt up immediately, knocking my head with hers. Her green eyes do not look happy right now.

"Oh shit! I must've overslept," I say and run a hand through my hair.

"You better get down there. School starts in 20 minutes." She smiles as I start to freak out and walks out of the room.

I quickly put on the first clothes I find. I run down the stairs and out of the house. I see Jace waiting in his car impatiently.

I feel very weird. There are so many feelings mixed up. The happiness of seeing my best friend, the panic of what if I have the dream written all over my face, some weird feelings fluttering in my chest…

I run to the car and go in. Jace does not look happy. Well at least it's better than the look in my dream.

"I am so, so sorry! I somehow managed to oversleep. I didn't sleep very well last night." I pout and try to look as sad as possible. He desperately tries to keep his face hard and angry, but I can see the corners of his mouth twitching and soon he breaks into a smile.

"I can't stay mad at you! You look so sad!" he says and ruffles my hair. He then turns to drive the car. His touch feels different, just like I was afraid. It feels good. It shouldn't. I'm not some girl who has a huge crush on Jace and has butterflies in the stomach. That's probably almost every girl in our high school.

He's the biggest player of our school. His looks have something to do with that. No girl can resist his golden blond hair or gold eyes or his perfectly muscled body. I think I am just as hot as Jace, but girls tend to be slightly intimidated by me for some reason. Maybe it's my black eyes. Also, Jace is more open and welcoming.

We arrive at school and Jace parks the car. I glance at the time and see that we're not late. I guess he drove faster.

"I guess we're not late!" I say happily. "Thanks to your amazing and fast driving skills." He looks at me amused and starts laughing.

"I'm not mad at you! You don't need to suck up to me. But thanks anyway." He smirks and we step out of the car. We start to walk towards the school entrance side by side. His arm brushes mine and it feels as good as it did in the dream. What the hell is wrong with me?! I will not let that stupid dream change my friendship with him!

I see Aline standing at the school entrance. She smiles at Jace and he smiles back. He walks to her and kisses her, his fingers tangling in her dark hair. I can't help the feel of jealousy that it causes. I also can't help but think how amazing those lips felt against mine in my dream. No! Bad thoughts! I will not let it change anything.

I walk inside the school and leave the happy couple behind.

* * *

><p>"You're not hungry?" Jace asks as we sit eating lunch in our usual table with our friends. Clary and I kind of collected friends from our classes and this group of friends was formed. Me and Jace do sometimes sit with the guys from our classes, but we prefer to sit with our real friends.<p>

I've been picking at my food for the past fifteen minutes. For some reason I can't eat. I know perfectly well that the reason is sitting right beside me.

"No, not really," I answer. He looks at me a concerned. He places his hand on my forehead to check if I have fever. I can't help that my eyes fall shut. I also can't help that it feels so much better than a friend's touch should feel. He removes his hand and I feel cold.

"Well, you don't have fever." He frowns. "Is everything all right? You've been acting a little weird today."

"Everything is great." I force a smile on my face. He looks at me skeptically and then turns back to eat his lunch.

"Okay," he says. "Whatever you say." I sigh in relief and he notices it. "But this is not the end of this conversation." Dammit!

* * *

><p>The rest of the school day goes fine. I have all my classes with Jace, but I won't let him bother me. I actually concentrate more in classes as I avoid thinking about him. This day should end already. It's been enough. I just need to go home and try to find out what the hell is going on with me, that how could one dream change everything.<p>

Thankfully the school ends and now I only have to endure the car ride with Jace. I have to ride to school with him, because the only car we have is our parent's car. So, Clary and I have to ride with our friends.

We walk towards Jace's car in the parking lot.

"So, do you wanna hang out? I could come to your house," Jace asks hopefully. I really wanna say no. But how can I say no to him with these stupid feelings?

"Okay. If you can put up with me. I haven't been feeling very well today."

"Really? I didn't notice," he says sarcastically. I just roll my eyes. We step into his car and he starts to drive to my house. "So, do you wanna talk about what's bothering you?" he asks.

"No, not really. Can you just hurry? I want some painkillers. I have a really bad headache."

"Sure thing," he says and drives a bit faster.

We arrive to my house and I'm not surprised to not see my parent's car. They always work late, because they own a company.

Jace parks the car and we get out. As we go inside the house, we go right away to my room upstairs. Finally I'm in my room! My room has dark blue walls and is quite big.

Right now my big, soft bed invites me in. I can't help but run to it. I collapse on my bed in content. I lie on my back and Jace comes to sit beside me. He sits on the exact same spot he sat in my dream.

"I totally forgot I needed the painkiller," I say painfully. I close my eyes and put my hands to cover my face. Suddenly I feel Jace removing my hands from my face. He starts to rub circles on my temples with his fingers.

His hands have the same calming effect that they did in my dream. It feels so good, but it also makes my head spin and it's not helping with my headache or my situation.

I open my eyes and see Jace staring me with concern. We stare at each other for a moment. "Do you feel any better?" he asks, still continuing with the movements.

I sit up and his hands fall from my temples. "Not really," I say. "I think I'm gonna see if Clary has painkillers. She gets a lot of headaches."

"I can go," he offers.

"No, I can do it myself. She doesn't like strangers going into her room." I get up and he follows me as I go to the door next to mine and open it. My eyes go wide and my mouth drops open. What the hell? I think Jace must be thinking the same.

What we see is Clary kissing passionately with another girl in her bed. But it's not just any girl. The girl is Jace's current girlfriend. Aline is lying on top of Clary. They don't seem to notice us as they continue kissing and feeling up each other's bodies.

"Do you think we should just leave?" I whisper at Jace.

"What the fuck are you doing, Aline?!" Jace yells. I guess that answered my question. The girls spring apart and sit up shocked.

"It's not what you think. We were just experimenting!" Aline yells desperately.

"Well, it didn't look like that to me," Jace says angrily. "It's alright. I was getting bored of you anyway," he says and goes back to my room. I stand at the doorway, embarrassed. I still need that painkiller!

"Um… Do you have any painkillers? My head is killing me."

Clary opens her nightstands drawer and finds a pack of them and throws it to me. I turn to leave, but her voice stops me. "Please don't tell mom and dad." She looks at me worried.

"I won't." I give her a small smile and close the door behind me. I go back to my room and find Jace sitting on my bed. He doesn't even look angry or sad.

"You don't look very sad, considering that you just broke up with your girlfriend." I go sit down next to him.

"I was getting tired of her anyways," he says and hands me the glass of water from my nightstand. I take the painkiller and go lie down.

"Did you know Clary was..? Well, whatever that makes her," he asks.

"No, I had no idea. Sometimes life can really surprise us." I close my eyes and try to rub my temples the same way Jace did, but it's nothing compared to his touch. He clearly notices as he replaces my hands with his. I can't help but sigh in content.

"I'm clearly much better in this than you," he says. He continues to do those calming circles and I feel myself drifting off to sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

I wake up and the first thing I notice is that someone is cuddling me. Oh shit! Don't tell me this is one of those dreams again.

I open my eyes and see that the person who is snuggling me is Jace. I'm lying on my back and his head is resting on my shoulder. His arm is around me. Shit. What do I do? I really need to use the bathroom! And I'm not feeling very comfortable, but at the same time I am.

I glance at the clock on my nightstand and see that it's one a.m. I definitely can't wake him up.

Maybe I can try to move him. I very carefully remove his arm from around me and then roll him to lie on his back without waking him up. Oh thank god! I get up from the bed and walk to the door. I quietly open it and glance at Jace. Good, he's still sleeping.

I step into the hallway and make my way to the bathroom. I quickly use the it and go back to my room. I very carefully and slowly close the door. I sigh in relief since I didn't make too much noise.

"You thought you could go to the bathroom without waking me up?" Jace asks amused, making me jump. I turn around quickly.

"Oh god, Jace, you scared me!" I whisper-shout at him. He laughs quietly. I walk back to the bed to lie down on my spot. Jace turns to lie on his side, facing me.

"So… Are you gonna tell me what's bothering you?" he asks.

"You just can't leave it, can you? And no, I'm not going to tell. At least not now. You would probably run away and it's one a.m." I turn to face him.

"It can't be that bad. Come on, tell me! I promise I won't run away." I look at him for a moment. Should I tell him? He's probably just gonna laugh at it.

"Fine," I say and look at him nervously. He looks at me with a triumphant smile on his face. "The reason I was acting so weird and slept badly last night was that…" How am I gonna do this? It's not even such a big deal! My mind just makes it huge. He's my best friend, so I should be able to tell him everything.

"Just spit it out!" Jace says, getting impatient.

"Okay, but you have to remember that I don't actually think like this, it was just a dream." He looks at me confused and nods slowly. "I- I had a romantic dream about you." I look at him carefully. He first has a face that seems to say 'Are you kidding with me?' and then he bursts out laughing, just like I thought he would.

"Are you serious? That was your 'problem'?" he asks, still laughing. He laughs for a moment and I wait patiently as he finally catches his breath.

"Are you done yet?" I ask a little pissed off. But that is a better reaction than if he would've run away.

"This is kind of ridiculous if you think," he says, grinning.

"What is so ridiculous about this?"

"Well, you know how all the girls always find me hot and probably have dirty dreams about me. But apparently I'm so hot that even my best friend does the same."

"First of all it wasn't a dirty dream. And second of all I don't find you hot."

"Everyone finds me hot! And if it wasn't a dirty dream, then what happened in it?" he asks confused.

"You have to promise not to judge me, because it wasn't like I was daydreaming about you." He nods and I continue. "Okay. In my dream you were touching me gently and it felt different. I guess it kind of messed my head a little. It was so weird. You told me I was beautiful and then we kissed passionately."

"I kind of understand how that can make someone think differently or feel weird. Are you okay now though? You're not having any weird feelings for me?" He doesn't look revolted or anything by the idea, just concerned.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Don't worry about it." I am still feeling weird towards him, but I think it'll go away. It has to.

"Good. But it's entirely your fault if I start to have these weird dreams too."

"Hey! You insisted to know what was wrong!"

"I know. Goodnight."

"Goodnight." We both lie on our backs. I somehow can't sleep. I try and I try, but the sleep won't come. I can hear from Jace's breathing that he is asleep. I also notice that he's asleep when he comes to snuggle me again.

"Jonathan," he mumbles in his sleep. Oh great! He's gonna kill me in the morning for telling him about my dream.

His body pressed against mine feels so relaxing and warm. I feel myself falling asleep.

* * *

><p>"Jonathan, wake up! We're gonna be late!" I hear Jace yell at me. Is there gonna be a morning I don't wake up someone yelling at me how I'm gonna be late or when I don't have to bolt out of bed? I sit up and look at the clock.<p>

"Oh shit!" I yell as I see the time. School will start in 15 minutes. It's less time than yesterday!

I quickly get out of bed and feel cold. I look down and see that I'm only wearing boxers. When did I take off my clothes?

I see Jace staring at me with a weird look on his face. I guess he had the dream too. I quickly put on the first clothes I find. We run down the stairs and out of the door. We run to his car and go in. He starts the car and drives to the direction of the school. I glance at the clock and see that we still have 12 minutes.

"I think there's something wrong with your bed. It makes people wake up too late." Jace laughs a little nervously. I guess today is his turn to be freaked out and act weird.

"Think I should change it?"

"Definitely. You know what else it does?" he asks, sounding a bit mad.

"What?" I ask amused, even though I already know the answer to that.

"Makes people have weird dreams about their friends." Here we go.

"Sorry," I laugh.

"It's not funny," he says through gritted teeth.

"You laughed at me last night." I still continue laughing.

"Shut up," he says but I can hear his voice start wavering with laughter. Soon we're both laughing and can't seem to find a way to stop. We control our laughter and a question pops into my head.

"What happened in your dream?" I probably shouldn't have asked that.

"It was a little more intimate than your dream. And it was just a dream, nothing to be freaked out about," he says as we arrive in the school parking lot. "So, we're cool, right? These dreams didn't make our friendship weird?"

"No, of course not." I smile at him.

"Good," he says and we step out of the car. "Now, since I broke up with Aline yesterday, I have to find a new girl today. I was thinking about your sister, but since she's… whatever the hell she is." That reminds me. I really need to talk to Clary about what's going on with her.

"Like I would even let you date Clary. I'm sure it won't be very hard for you to find a new one," I say as I see almost every girl in the parking lot looking at Jace. He winks at some of them and tries to find his next victim. He finds what he's looking for and goes to talk to a group of girls.

I walk towards the entrance of the school and suddenly Clary comes to walk beside me. "Hello, brother," she says smiling. I smile back and ruffle her messy, red curls.

"Hey, sis. What's up?" I ask, because clearly something is up. She has this look on her face like she's trying to stifle a laugh.

"Nothing," she says and glances at me with the same look on her face.

"Okayyy…" I say and we continue walking. I see her looking at me once in a while. I stop her by taking her by her shoulder. "Okay, that's it! What's going on? Do I have something on my face or is there something wrong with my clothes?"

"No there's nothing wrong, you look fine. It's just that last night when I went to use the bathroom I heard some pretty interesting noises coming out of your room. Usually I wouldn't really pay attention, but I knew that Jace was staying over so…"

"So… What? Do you think we were doing something or what is it that you're trying to say? You know that Jace is the biggest player of the school. And we're both straight and have been friends for a long time."

"I know. It's just that, I really almost thought that you were doing something when I heard him moaning your name," she says and smirks at me. Why can't she just leave it?

"So what? He was having a dream. I had one of him the night before." The words just stumble out of my mouth. Her eyes widen and so does her smile.

"Oh my god! This means something! Awww. You guys are gonna make such a cute couple."

"Shut up! It was just a dream! It didn't mean anything."

"You told her about our dreams?!" Jace exclaims. Shit. I didn't notice him coming from behind me.

"No, I didn't. She went to use the bathroom at night and heard you moaning my name, so I had to tell her about the dreams."

"You cannot tell anyone about this. Got it? Otherwise I'm going to tell what we saw you doing yesterday with Aline," Jace says smugly at Clary and her face turns frightened.

"Fine. Just please don't tell anyone about me." Jace nods and walks into the school. Clary is about to leave, but I grab her by the arm.

"Hey, do you want to talk about it?" She smiles gratefully at me.

"Yes that would be great. I'm kind of confused about all that's going on with me. We'll talk tonight, okay?" I nod and pull her in for a quick hug and we walk inside the school.

* * *

><p>Today has been better. I don't have the weird feelings for my best friend. I think. No, I'm sure. Or maybe I'm just denying the feelings and pushing my thoughts and feelings back there where I can't reach them. That doesn't make any sense.<p>

I'm completely alone with these thoughts. There's no one to talk about them. That's not completely true. There are people sitting at my lunch table. Jace is sitting beside me, making out with some girl. I guess he wasn't so affected by his dream as I am mine. Clary is sitting across from me, talking to her friends Simon and Isabelle. Magnus and Alec are kissing and right now in this disorientated state I'm in, I find it kind of fascinating.

I guess I could talk to Clary when we're gonna talk tonight. We're almost in a same kind of situation.

"Jon, are you okay?" Clary asks. I look at her questioningly. "It's just that, you haven't eaten anything and you usually have quite the appetite," she laughs at me.

"Shut up!" I snap at her playfully. "I was just deep in thought and forgot to eat."

"You're okay though?" She looks at me concerned.

"Yes I'm fine. We'll talk tonight, okay?" She nods.

I notice that Jace has stopped kissing the girl and is frowning at me. He must think I still act weird because of the dream. I smile quickly at him and start to eat. Is everyone happy now?!


	3. Chapter 3

I'm sitting on my bed, doing my homework when suddenly I hear a knock. The door opens and Clary walks in.

"Do you think we could talk now?" she asks.

"Yes, of course. Come here." I pat the space next to me. She sits next to me, looking a little nervous. "So… You and Aline are…"

"We're still just friends. We were just… Because we're both kind of… Oh! I don't know." She puts her head in her hands and I rub her back. "That's why I kind of needed to talk. Because I don't know what I am anymore or what I feel for Aline."

"I kind of know what you're saying. Ever since I had the dream about Jace, I started to have these weird feelings." She looks up and smiles brightly.

"I knew there was something going on!" she exclaims triumphantly.

"Well, no shit. Yesterday morning I overslept and you had to wake me up. And the fact that I haven't been able to eat very well lately. Not to mention that you heard Jace moan my name last night."

"Yeah about that…. He might have the weird feelings too. Then again it's Jace we're talking about and just today he was kissing some new girl after breaking up with Aline yesterday."

"I don't know what to do. Should I just pretend that I don't have any of these feelings and just continue like nothing happened?" I ask desperately.

"I don't know, but maybe I could do just that. That's a great idea! Thank you!" She smiles and hugs me.

"You know, I didn't say you should do that. But maybe I'm gonna do that too." Clary looks at me sadly.

"Oh no! I thought you guys would make such a cute couple!" she whines and I roll my eyes.

"Did you totally forget what you just said about Jace? He is like the straightest person in the whole world. And what am I even saying?! I don't have feelings for him! At least I don't want to."

"Yeah, but we can't help how we feel. You can't hide your feelings forever. Not from Jace or yourself. Maybe you should wait for a while and see if those feelings for him go away and if they don't then maybe you need to tell him about it. I will also think about my feelings for Aline and then confront her if I feel like it's necessary. Okay?" She smiles softly.

"Yeah, that sounds good. I just don't want to ruin my friendship with Jace, but maybe I can't keep my feelings bottled up inside for too long. Thank you," I say and hug her.

"No, problem," she says and gets out of my room.

I guess only time will tell. I really hope these strange feelings will go away. I do not want to tell Jace about them. I mean, how uncomfortable and awkward would that be?

* * *

><p>Next few days are pretty much the same. I don't have any dreams about Jace, but my feelings for him won't go away. Jace keeps having a different girl every day. Clary and I talk about our situations and she doesn't seem to have any improvement either.<p>

Before I know it, it's Saturday and Jace wants to hang out with me, because he has noticed how I've been a little distant with him lately.

He arrives to my house and we go to my room. We sit on my bed side by side. The atmosphere is a bit awkward.

"So…" Jace says. "Do you wanna watch a movie or something?"

"Something," is my pathetic attempt to loosen up the mood a bit.

"Very funny," he says and pushes me down on the bed, laughing. Both of our smiles disappear as we notice the position we're in. He's almost lying on top of me and his face is close to mine. His eyes are staring into mine.

I wish so badly that he would bring his lips down to meet mine. It freaks me out and it's wrong to think like this about my best friend, but I can't help it. I want to feel those soft, full lips on mine. But of course I don't, because this is Jace.

He pulls away and we sit up. We're back where we started. Except that things are even more awkward now.

"So… How about that movie?" I ask looking at Jace who is staring at the big TV hanging on the wall.

"Yeah, okay," he answers and I go open the TV to see if there's any good movie going on. The first image that appears on the TV screen is two guys kissing passionately. Why oh why?!

Now, since I didn't use the remote to open the TV, I don't know where it is. I desperately try to find it. This is so incredibly uncomfortable. It's like the TV knew what I was thinking!

"Shit! I can't find the remote!" I run a hand through my hair in frustration.

"Calm down. It's not the end of the world. You're not dying." Jace is looking at me from the bed amused. I turn back to look at the TV and see that the guys are taking off each other's clothes. My eyes widen and I look back at Jace.

"They're getting it on! This is probably some gay porn movie! What the hell?!" I panic and Jace is looking at me like he's gonna burst out laughing in any minute. And he does.

"_Ohhhhh!_" I hear coming from the TV. I turn to look at it wide-eyed and see them _pleasuring _each other. I hear Jace laughing even louder.

"This _is _a porn movie! Where the hell is the remote?!" I walk around my room trying to find the remote.

"_Oh yes,_" is another noise of pleasure coming from the movie. I involuntarily take a look at it and see that there's a big penis on my big TV screen.

"Has it come to your mind that you could just you know, turn off the television?" Jace asks, still laughing a bit. I look at him dumbfounded. Why did I not think of that before?! I was just so concentrated on finding the remote so that I could change the channel.

I rush to turn it off and sigh in relief. Jace is still laughing his ass off. There's also another laugh coming from the other side of the door. It sounds more like a girly giggle. I know just who it is.

I open the door and see Clary laughing so hard that there are tears coming out of her eyes. She laughs even harder when she sees me.

"What's so funny?" I ask calmly and Clary's laughter dies immediately.

"You know how sometimes laugh can be contagious? Well, I heard Jace laughing and I heard you cursing and the porn…" She's stopped as she starts to laugh again. I almost start laughing too, but then I notice that her hands are behind her back like she's hiding something.

"Why are your hands behind your back?" I ask suspiciously and she gets serious. She starts to back away slowly from me, but I catch her by the arm and gently but firmly drag her to my room and close the door. She swallows nervously.

"Now, take your hands from behind your back," I demand calmly, looking into her slightly frightened green eyes.

"No," she says.

"No? Really? Are you sure about that?" She nods. "Jace! Get her," I say to Jace who has been watching us amused from the bed. He gets up from the bed, grinning like a maniac. I'd be terrified if I'd be Clary right now.

"Don't you dare come any closer," Clary tries to sound threatening, but Jace is slowly coming closer. Just as he's about to reach her, she sprints away. They run around the room, jumping to my bed and running around me. As much fun as it is to watch them, I decide it's time for me to step in.

Clary runs away from Jace only to run into my hard chest. She turns around and runs into a trap. Jace wraps his arms around her, keeping her in place while I take the two remotes out of her hands. She had my TV's and DVD player's remotes. Jace lets go of Clary and she turns around, her face slightly red.

"Why do you have my remotes?" She looks away embarrassed and she's biting her lip likes she's about to burst into laughter.

I open the DVD player and take the porn movie in my hand.

"City Of Boners?" I read the movie title confused. That's when she starts to laugh hard, so does Jace. I turn to glare at him, but he just continues to laugh.

"Oh come on! You have to admit it was even a little bit funny," Clary manages to say between laughs.

"Yeah! Especially your expressions!" Jace laughs. I must've looked quite funny overreacting to the situation. I start to laugh a little too.

"So, you're not mad at me?" Clary asks warily, her expression worried.

"No. But I'd be aware if I were you," I warn her.

"Of course," she says and opens the door.

"Wait! You forgot your porn." I smirk and try to give her the disc, but she doesn't take it. She just smiles at me sweetly.

"Oh no! I can't take it. I bought it just for you. Consider it as an early birthday gift."

"My birthday was last month," I say through gritted teeth. I can't believe she's doing this in front of Jace! What if he starts to think I'm gay?

"Well, late birthday gift then. Oh! And for Christmas I can get you the sequel: 'City Of Asses'," she says and runs out the door, leaving me with the DVD still in my hand. I sigh and turn around to look at Jace. He's looking at me suspiciously.

"So, how about that movie?" I ask before he has time to say anything. He looks at the DVD I'm still holding. "Oh no! I don't mean this!" Jace grins at me.

"Why not?" he asks, surprising me completely.

"Are you serious? You want to watch gay porn?" I look at him weirdly.

"I'm curious of how gays have sex." He shrugs. I raise one eyebrow.

"How do you think?" I ask like he should know.

"Are you scared?" he challenges. "Scared that you'll end up enjoying it? After all, you did have that dream about me." He smiles smugly.

"Really? Did you have to bring in the dream? You had one too!"

"Yes I did, but I'm not the one who's afraid of watching some gay action. I'm not the one who just freaked out after seeing two guys kissing. I'm not afraid to watch it, because I know I'm not going to enjoy it. I know what I am. Can you say the same?"

I glare at him. How dare he? I'm not going to let him get to me. I'm also not going to let him see me acting weird. Anymore.

"Fine," I say and put the disc inside the DVD player. This shouldn't be awkward since we've been friends for six years now, but I do feel a bit uncomfortable.

I sit down on the bed, my back against the headboard. Jace sits beside me and I see him looking at me.

"You're not mad at me, are you? I'm sorry if I was being an ass, okay? I don't want my best friend to be mad at me." I turn to look at his gold eyes that are too close to me. I find those eyes so beautiful, that it's hard for me to find the right words. It didn't use to be this way before.

"No. I couldn't be mad at you." I smile at him. We're still looking at each other, when suddenly a typical porn movie music starts loudly. I turn my head to look at the DVD menu of 'City Of Boners'. Great, I almost forgot I was going to watch gay porn with my best friend.

I press play and the first image that appears is two guys sitting on a bed like we are right now. Can this evening get any more uncomfortable? Yes, it probably can, because the movie has barely even started yet. I just have to wish I won't enjoy watching this. That would be incredibly embarrassing.

"Which one do you think is better looking?" Jace suddenly asks. I turn to look at him bemused. Did he really ask that?

"What?" I ask confused.

"I think the one with the lighter shade of blond hair." He says. I turn my attention back to the movie and I notice that both guys have blond hair, but the other guy's hair is lighter than the other one's, almost like us. I have a feeling that Clary picked up this movie on purpose. It can't have so many coincidences. "What do you think?"

"Huh?" I come back to reality.

"Which one do you like better?" he insists.

"You know, we shouldn't talk this way. We're not teenage girls. We're guys."

"Yeah, but-" he tries, but I interrupt.

"Let's just watch the movie," I say, because I don't want to let him know that I prefer the one with the darker shade of blond hair, like him.

He turns his gaze back to the movie. They were just talking and now they're suddenly kissing. Their kisses are slow and hesitant, like they're experimenting. Slowly their kisses grow more urgent and passionate.

If only I could kiss Jace that way. I just want to know if I really feel something for him or if it's just the dream still affecting me. But I can't just ask him to kiss me.

I'm very much aware of how close we're sitting. His arm is barely touching mine and I can feel as he breaths. I can smell his familiar and amazing scent. I want to be so much closer to him. I want to wrap my arms around his body and to feel his muscled arms around me.

I have to stop thinking like this! It's only making everything worse. What if I accidentally say some of these things out loud? What if my feelings for him get stronger?

"Have you ever thought about kissing another guy?" Jace suddenly asks and I turn to look at him shocked. Where are all these things coming from? First he wants to watch gay porn. Then he asks which one of the guys is better looking and now this. Maybe it's just the movie that's making him ask all these questions.

"Um, not really," I lie. "I did have the dream where you kissed me."

"Did you like it in the dream?" he asks. How can I dodge that question? There's no way I'm going to tell him how much I liked it.

"It was just a dream. It doesn't matter what it felt like."

"I know, but-" he says, but I interrupt him.

"Let's just watch the movie," I say, trying not to sound too harsh, but enough to make him shut up. Fortunately he does shut up.

I turn my attention back to the movie and see that the guys are now taking each other's clothes off. Soon they're both naked and I have to admit that they have pretty nice cocks.

"They do, but mine is better," Jace says and I realize that I said that out loud. This is exactly what I was afraid of.

"Did I say that out loud?" I ask confused. Jace turns to smirk at me.

"Yes you did. But don't worry it doesn't make you gay. Maybe," he says and we continue watching the movie.

Now the other one is stroking the other's hard cock. It looks really hot. Then he takes it in his mouth and starts sucking it. The sight of that makes my dick harden a bit. What am I going to do now? I don't want to get too turned on. I especially don't want Jace to notice that I'm enjoying this. I'm glad my jeans are tight, so it won't probably even show.

I notice Jace looking at the screen with a blank face. Isn't he enjoying this even a little bit? Maybe not, because he is super straight. I guess he could only enjoy this if some bimbo would be sucking the cock instead of a guy.

The guy that's being sucked comes to the other guy's mouth and I feel myself getting even harder. My pants are starting to get too tight. I wish I could just release my dick from my jeans and masturbate while watching this, Jace being right next to me.

I have to say, my thoughts are starting to really freak me out. Am I gay or bi or something? Am I starting to fall for my friend who can never feel the same way about me? The thought almost makes my dick go down. Unfortunately it doesn't.

We watch the rest of the movie. The other guy sucks the other one too and then they have sex. My pants are way too tight and I feel very uncomfortable.

As the movie ends, I turn off the TV and the room becomes uncomfortably silent.

"Well that was fun," Jace says and stretches his back.

"Not really," I say. "Should we watch another movie? Like 'The Exorcist' or 'Martyrs'?" Because those movies would definitely get rid of my hard on. Jace grins at me like he knows what I'm thinking. Maybe I am being too transparent.

"Why? Got too excited?" And I was right.

"No, of course not. Why would I get excited while watching gay porn? Anyway, I was more like thinking of a way to balance the situation after what we just watched." I'm probably not making any sense. Jace does look confused.

"What do you mean?"

"Forget it. It's getting late anyway. I think we should just end our night here." Jace looks at me sadly.

"Why are you so eager to get rid of me? And why have you been avoiding me this week?" Now, that is a question I do not want to answer.

"I just had a bad week." Jace nods, but I don't know if he really bought it.

"Is it okay if I stay for the night? I'm just really tired, but I can go home if-"

"Of course you can stay," I interrupt and smile. I think it would raise too many suspicions if I would say no. I mean, of course I want him here, but it's hard because of all these stupid weird feelings I have for him.

We decide to go eat something downstairs. As we walk, I notice that I don't have my hard on anymore. Maybe just the thought of those horror movies did it for me.

We walk through the dining room and see Clary sitting at the dining table, drawing. She lifts her head from her sketchbook and grins at us.

"What are you grinning at?" I ask.

"I know you watched the movie. Did you guys enjoy it?"

"No, of course not," I say a little nervously.

"Really? I'm sure you wanted to watch those horrible films just for fun," Jace says sarcastically.

"Maybe I just wanted to feel something," I say.

"I think you felt enough already," Clary says amused. She and Jace start to laugh at that. I get pissed off and storm off to kitchen. I'm not very hungry anymore, but I just can't stand the way Clary keeps teasing me today. I mean, does she want Jace to know about my weird feelings for him?

Jace soon follows me to the kitchen.

"I'm sorry for being a bit annoying today. It's really not even my fault. Clary is provoking me!" Jace says and I lift my head. He does look apologetic.

"It's okay. I understand. I'm more mad at her. She's been very difficult today." A smile spreads to his face and it makes me feel all kinds of things.

"So, we're okay?" he asks hopefully and I nod. "Come here," he says as he spreads his arms. I walk to him and he pulls me into an awkward man hug where we pat each other's backs. Suddenly neither of us is doing any patting and things get a little awkward.

We stand there in each other's arms and it feels wonderful. My heart is beating so fast and I hope he doesn't notice that. I don't want to separate. It's going to be extremely uncomfortable. He's so warm and I don't think I've ever felt this good just by hugging someone.

This is something that has probably happened in a lot of movies and tv-series, but I can't really remember what they do after they separate. Fortunately and unfortunately, I don't have to remember since I hear an amused "ahem" coming from the kitchen doorway.

We spring apart fast and turn to look at a very amused looking Clary.

"I just came to see why you guys were so quiet. Like if you were at each other's throats or something. But I see you're just fine. So, I'm gonna go. Goodnight!" she says cheerfully and leaves us in the kitchen. I walk to the fridge and open it.

"So what do you wanna eat?" I ask, trying my best to ignore what just happened.

"Anything is fine," he answers blankly. This is a perfect opportunity to lighten up the mood. What is something he would absolutely not eat? Mushrooms! Jace hates mushrooms. He also hates ducks, but it's not like we have a duck in our fridge.

"Catch it!" I say and Jace looks at me questioningly. I throw the pack of mushrooms to him and he quickly catches it. He looks at it disgusted and I start to laugh. "What? You said anything is fine." He tries to stay mad at me, but fails when a smile spreads to his face. He throws the mushrooms back to me and I put it back.

"Now, do you have anything _good_?" he asks and I take out some leftover pizza. We go to the dining room to eat.

After we eat, we go back to my room. We decide to go to sleep. I take off my clothes, but leave my boxers on.

I lie down on the bed under the covers and see that Jace is now dressed the same way as me. I kind of wish he wouldn't be. But it's not like I can ask him to sleep with all his clothes on. I just don't want him to catch me looking at him. I wouldn't be surprised if I would be drooling. His muscles are just too hot. I still can't believe I'm thinking like this about him.

I turn my head away before he notices, if he hasn't noticed already. He lies beside me.

"Goodnight," I say.

"Goodnight."

Once again I can't sleep. Apparently Jace can since he suddenly comes to snuggle my back. Why has he done that recently? He hasn't done it before. And we've been sleeping in a same bed a lot during our six years long friendship.

How do I even know if he's really asleep? Maybe that's just wishful thinking. There's no way he could respond to my feelings. I put my arms on top his and entwine my fingers with his. His body against mine has the same calming effect and I fall asleep in no time, feeling his breath on my neck.

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><p><strong>I hope you liked it :)<strong>


	4. Chapter 4

"I'm so exhausted," I complain as I slump down to a bench in the locker room. The reason why I'm so exhausted is that we just had a very active gym class. I just want to skip the rest of the day and go back to sleep to my comfortable big bed, with Jace's arms wrapped around me. The situation is even worse since it's Monday morning and I'm so tired. Normally I love sport and am very energetic, but now the situation is different.

See, I didn't have Jace last night. It's like my body has noticed how comfortable and peaceful it is to sleep with his arms around me. I can't seem to be able to sleep very well anymore without him. Suddenly I feel someone nudge my shoulder. I had shut my eyes and as I open them I see Jace sitting next to me on the bench.

"What?" I say as I yawn. He chuckles.

"Didn't sleep well?"

"How can you tell?" I ask sarcastically.

"Well, I'm pretty tired too. So what do you say, should we skip the rest of the day? It's not like we have anything important today." Again he is hypnotizing me with those gold eyes and making it impossible for me to say no. Plus, I was just thinking about the same thing.

"Sure. That sounds like a good idea. Let me just go get showered and then we can go." Jace already took a quick shower while I was half sleeping on the bench.

"I'll wait outside," he says and gets up and leaves the locker room. I go take a quick shower and when I return there aren't many guys there anymore. I'm on very slow today so it takes a while for me to get dressed. When I have finished dressing, everyone else has already left. Or that's what I thought.

When I start to walk towards the door, I feel a hand grab me and spin me around. I come face to face with Sebastian Verlac.

He pushes me against the wall and presses his body tightly against mine. He puts his hands against the wall beside my head. His brown eyes are looking at me closely, maybe too closely. What the hell is he doing? Did I do something wrong?

"I've seen the way you've been acting around Jace lately," he says and my eyes widen for a second, but then I manage to put an angry face.

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"It's okay, I won't tell anyone. I'm not here to blackmail you," he reassures.

"Then what do you want?" I ask confused.

"You do know he's never gonna feel the same way about you? And you do realize that instead of just hopelessly daydreaming about him, you could have some fun." After saying that, he looks down at my lips. What the hell is wrong with him? He has dated a lot of girls, my sister being one of them. So, I don't really understand why he's acting this way. Has everyone suddenly turned gay or bi or something?

"I don't know what you mean," I say and I notice that my voice is wavering a bit.

"I can just show you what I mean." He starts to lean closer and seeing that I don't stop him, he brings his lips to mine. First he kisses me carefully and slowly, to see if I'll pull away. When he notices that I start to kiss him back he starts to kiss me more fiercely and I respond just as eagerly, enjoying the feeling of his lips against mine. I tangle my hand in his messy, dark hair.

Suddenly I feel his tongue plunging into my mouth, running along mine. This all feels so amazing that I can't stop the groan that escapes me. Kissing him feels better and different than kissing any of the girls I've kissed. That thought kind of freaks me out. But right now I'm too busy to care about that.

After a few minutes of passionate kissing, licking and hair pulling, we separate. Both of us are breathing very heavily.

"That was…" I say, breathless.

"Amazing. I know. We should do it again sometime." He grins at me. As amazing as it was, I'm not sure if I really want to do it again. Sure it felt good, but not right. I definitely know why. He's not Jace. Shit! Jace has probably already left or he's still waiting impatiently.

"Yeah. Well, I need to go," I say and push him off of me and run out of the door. I scan the hallway, trying to find Jace, but it's empty. Except it's not. Jace is sitting against the wall, eyes closed. I walk towards him and kneel beside him. He's sleeping. I can't help but smile at the sight.

"Jace, wake up." I gently shake his shoulder. He opens his eyes and looks around confused.

"Did I fall asleep?" he asks sleepily.

"Yes you did. Come on, get up. We need to go before someone sees us." He gets up and stretches his arms up, revealing a bit of his perfect six pack. My eyes involuntarily land on it. I quickly move my gaze away from it and see Sebastian coming out of the locker room.

He grins at me widely and walks closer. As he passes me he slaps my ass and winks at me. Then he just continues walking like nothing happened. Jace is staring at me mouth open.

"What the hell was that?" he asks utterly confused and shocked.

"He's just messing with me. Don't be so shocked."

"Don't be shocked? He just slapped your ass!" he exclaims and I flinch at how loudly he's speaking, because I don't want anyone to catch us ditching. I grab him by the arm and start dragging him along. "What are you doing?"

"Someone might have heard that and come see who it was and find us skipping class." We step outside and walk towards his car.

"Sorry," he says embarrassed. "I just don't get it. Why would Sebastian slap any guy on the ass?" I roll my eyes at his ridiculousness.

"Why are you making this such a big deal? It's not like he grabbed my dick or anything." He stops and stares at me.

"You're right. I guess I'm overreacting. I'm just so tired," he says and yawns.

"I know, me too. So will you take me home now?"

"Yeah, sure."

We go inside his car. He drives away fast and soon we arrive in front of my house.

"See you tomorrow," I say and move to get out of the car, but he stops me.

"Could I come with you? I'm way too tired to drive to my house, even if it's not so far. You don't want your best friend to die in a car accident for being too tired, right?" he pleads, which is very unnecessary. I just can't seem to deny anything from anymore.

"Of course."

We walk inside the house and go to my room. I nearly run to the bed and collapse down on it. Jace comes to lie down next to me. Just as I'm about to fall asleep, I feel the familiar pair of strong arms wrap around me.

* * *

><p>I wake up and it's dark. How long have I been asleep? I look at the clock on my nightstand and see that it's eight p.m. My eyes widen and I bolt up, definitely waking up Jace whose arms were still tightly wrapped around me.<p>

I turn to look at him and see him stretching and yawning, still lying down. I turn my head away fast. I don't want to be caught looking at his abs or just looking at him how sexy he looks while he's lying on my bed.

"What time is it?" he asks in a husky sleepy voice that I find incredibly hot.

"Eight." That makes him bolt up too, his eyes wide and his blond curls disheveled.

"What?!" he exclaims. "Eight?! Great! I guess I'll be tired tomorrow too, since I won't be sleeping much tonight."

"Well that makes two of us. I only slept like two or three hours last night, so I guess I kind of understand why I slept so long."

"Why couldn't you sleep last night?" I really can't blurt out how I sleep better feeling his body pressed against mine. I don't think he would ever sleep in the same bed with me again after hearing that.

"I guess my thoughts were too loud. I was thinking about too many things and my brain wouldn't shut down." That is true too. I do think about him a lot when I'm alone at night. I think about how this all started and how scared I am of the sudden change. I don't want my friendship with him to change. I still don't know where that dream suddenly came from. I'm so confused and I can't get my thoughts together.

I just wish I could go back to normal, when I would see Jace just as a friend. But a part of me is thinking if I've ever thought of him just as a friend. What if I've had these feelings all this time and suddenly my subconscious decided to bring it up and show me how I really feel?

"Do you wanna get something to eat? I'm starving. I didn't even get a change to eat breakfast." I change the subject before he asks what I was thinking about.

"Yeah, let me just use the bathroom. You can go, I'll be right down." I nod and walk downstairs. I see Clary sitting on the couch watching TV. I decide to go sit down next to her while waiting for Jace.

"Why weren't you at school today?" she asks. Why didn't I think about this before I sat down?

"I was at gym class, but then I got too tired, so we left." It's not like she's going to tell our parents or the teachers or anything.

"We?"

"Um… Yeah, Jace was tired too, so he suggested we could skip the rest of the day." She raises her eyebrows and grins.

"So you slept together again? You've been doing that a lot lately."

"We haven't done it more than usually. We've been friends for a long time, so it's nothing new for us to sleep in the same bed," I try to defend, but I don't know if it's very convincing.

"You might have done it before, but things are different now. Am I right?"

"Yeah, but… Can we just talk about something else?"

"Okay," she says and her eyes get a mischievous glint in them. That does not promise anything good. "Sebastian asked about you today." My face gets deadly serious and I feel some color creeping up to my pale cheeks.

"What did he say?" I try to sound nonchalant, but I'm probably failing miserably.

"He just asked if I had seen you today and if I knew where you went." She looks at me suspiciously. "Is something going on between you two?" What is taking Jace so long? Come on, hurry up!

"Um… Nothing."

"Nothing? It doesn't seem like nothing. I thought you and Sebastian weren't friends. I could just go ask him about it, but I'm sure you would save me from the payment he would probably require for the information." I'm pretty sure I know what that payment would be. And I do not want him harassing my sister.

"He kissed me," I confess quietly, because Jace might be on his way and I don't want him to hear. Her eyes widen and she stands up shocked.

"Sebastian kissed you?!" she screeches. I think I can abandon all hope that Jace didn't hear that.

"What?!" I hear a voice coming from the direction of the stairs. I can't believe this is happening. I bury my face in my hands. I can hear Jace's footsteps coming closer. "What did you do? Did you push him away?" he asks.

"No, I didn't. I kissed him back," I say to my hands, because I'm too afraid to raise my head and see his reaction.

"So…. Are you… gay?" he asks hesitantly and that makes me raise my head and look at him. He looks curious. He's not angry or disgusted like I thought. Not that I actually thought he would be, but I was just afraid. I'm still scared that he might push me away or create some distance between us.

"No. I don't think I'm gay. I don't really know what I am. I've always liked girls and I guess now I like guys too. I'm really confused. I guess I just don't want to define myself."

"Why haven't you told me this before? You know you can talk to me about anything and I won't judge you." I wish he wouldn't be so damn understanding and nice. It'd be easier to not like him. Seeing him being like this is only making me like him more.

"I haven't had the chance. I've been afraid how you'd react if you'd find out how I feel." Jace comes to sit next to me on the couch.

"It doesn't matter to me what you are. But I don't think dating Sebastian is the wisest thing to do." He grins and his tone gets amused. It feels so much lighter now that I've got that off my back. I am still hiding my feelings for him and the heavy feeling comes back as I realize this.

"I'm _not_ going to date him. We kissed and it was fun, but he's kind of an asshole," I say and we laugh.

"Hey! He's my ex!" I hear Clary exclaim. I totally forgot she was still here. I can hear from her tone that she's only half serious.

"Hey that's right!" Jace realizes. "Maybe you could have a threesome." He grins. I just stare at him disgusted and he starts to laugh.

"Ewww! He's my brother!" Clary yells.

"Who? Sebastian? I didn't know you liked incest," Jace teases her and I laugh.

"Idiot!" she yells and stomps off leaving me and Jace laughing hard. As our laughter dies, I realize why we came here in the first place.

"So, what do you wanna eat?" I ask.

"Oh right! I totally forgot we needed to eat." I look at him, waiting him to answer my question, but he just looks confused. "What?"

"I asked you a question, remember?"

"Oh! Yeah, anything is fine. Let's go." He gets up and I follow him to the kitchen. "Oh, and I don't literally mean _anything_."

"Well you did say anything is fine so how about…" I say as I search through the fridge. He pushes me out of the way before I can think of anything. He finds some food and we go eat it at the dining table.

"What do you wanna do tonight since we can't sleep? Wanna watch movies?" I hope he doesn't remember the last movie we watched. Judging by the grin that appears on his face, he does remember.

"What kind of movies? Wanna watch the sequel, 'City Of Asses'?" I can feel my face heating up.

"No, I don't."

"Got too excited last time? I knew it!"

"How about we watch… Hmmm…. Stephen King's 'It'?" I ask, because I know how much Jace is afraid of clowns. His face goes pale and he shudders. "Are you scared?" Now it's my turn to tease him.

"Of course not! I'm not a wuss!" he tries to defend himself, but I can see the fear in his eyes.

"Fine. Then let's watch it." We get up and go to my room. This is going to be fun.

* * *

><p><strong>Thanks for the reviews, favs and follows :)<strong>

**In the next chapter they're going to watch 'It' (which is a horror movie with this creepy clown) and Jace is going to be terrified.**


	5. Chapter 5

I go sit on my bed next to Jace after I've put the DVD into the player. He looks extremely pale and very scared.

"Are you sure wanna do this?" He quickly turns to look at me.

"Of course I wanna do this! I'm not scared!" he says, but he isn't fooling me. I know he's absolutely terrified and I don't know if I should just enjoy seeing him like that or just pick up some other movie.

"Are you sure? You look very pale."

"I'm fine! Let's just watch the movie!"

I turn to face the TV and press play. I can see his hands shaking a bit and the movie hasn't even started yet. I wonder if he has some childhood trauma that includes clowns.

"Jonathan, I'm scared," he whispers while the opening credits are still going on. I'm surprised he admitted it this early. His phobia might be even worse than I thought. Maybe he will cling onto me if he gets too scared.

"It's the opening credits. Are you even watching it?" I turn to look at him and his eyes _are _open, wide open with fear.

"Yeah, but I don't know if it's just going to pop up suddenly and scare the shit out of me."

"What it?" I ask, teasing him, because I know he doesn't even wanna say it out loud.

"You know, it."

"Yes, that's the name of the movie." I tease and he growls in frustration.

"Let's just watch the movie."

The opening credits end and the movie starts. Jace gets even more anxious. He's moving closer to me until he's sitting right by my side. Then comes the moment I've been most expecting for and Jace has been most dreading for.

"Oh my god!" Jace screeches as a clowns face flashes on the screen. He buries his face on my shoulder. It's just what I hoped would happen. "Is it gone?" he asks scared.

"Yes it's gone," I answer, but then it appears again just as I said that and just as Jace turns his face back on the screen. Oh no…

"Oh shit!" he yells and buries his face back to my shoulder. "You said it was gone!"

"Sorry. It was gone for a while," I say apologetically.

"Well, tell me when it's gone permanently!" I'd rather not tell, because he feels so good breathing on my shoulder.

"It's not going to be gone permanently. We can just stop watching it if you're too scared."

"No! I'm not scared," he says and unfortunately pulls his face from my shoulder.

The movie goes on and the clown appears again and he jumps wide eyed.

"I'm not scared," he tries to reassure.

"I didn't say you were."

We continue watching and the next time the clown comes he doesn't even try to pretend not to be scared. He wraps his arms around me and somehow manages to keep his eyes on the screen.

"It's coming to get me, Jonathan!"

"It's just a movie. It can't get to you," I try to comfort him and wrap my arms around him. I feel like I'm taking advantage of the situation, but I'm not getting many opportunities to be this close to him.

"But it's going to come through the TV! It happened on 'The Ring'."

"That's just another movie. There's no way it's going to get to you." It's getting ridiculous already. It's like trying to reassure a five year old. I really don't mind though. I'm enjoying the feeling of his strong arms around me, squeezing me tightly. It's making me feel very warm inside and fluttering in my chest.

"Yeah, but what if there's some crazy psycho clown out there that's going to kill me?" He's almost hysterical and I don't find it very funny anymore.

"Okay, that's it," I say and turn off the TV. Jace doesn't even try to protest. He just sighs in relief. He doesn't take his arms from around me and we stay like that. It's quiet and dark. The only thing I can hear is Jace's breathing slowing down to normal. "Are you tired?" I ask, though it's a pretty dumb question. We just woke up couple of hours ago.

"I don't think I've ever been more awake. I probably can't sleep for a few days after that."

"Do you want to watch something else, to get your mind off of that?" His arms are loosening, but he doesn't let go. I wonder when he's going to realize the position we're in.

"Like what?" I notice that his tone got a glint of amusement in it and I know just what he's thinking. "Like 'City Of Asses'?" He chuckles. Yes, I was right. I roll my eyes. I'm so sick of him teasing me about it, so I decide to tease back.

"Oh no! We don't have it. I'm so sorry. I knew how much you wanted to see it!" I say in an apologetic voice.

"I don't want to see it," he says grimly.

"You kind of just said you do. But don't worry. I still have 'City Of Boners'!" I say cheerfully.

"Shut up," he says and rests his head on my shoulder. Why is he acting this way? I close my eyes and enjoy this closeness while it lasts. We stay that way for a while and then I start to feel the need to go to the bathroom. I really don't want to get up. This is like once in a life time opportunity for me. Unless I make him watch the movie again, but I don't think I can do that.

"I need to use the bathroom."

"Okay," he says, but doesn't let me go.

"I need you to let go of me." He still doesn't move.

"What if the clown appears while you're gone? And then when you come back you find me dead here?"

"Why are you so paranoid? No one is going to come here and I'll be back just in a sec." He then slowly lets go of me and I get up. I leave him to sit stiffly on my bed and go to the bathroom.

When I'm done and I'm about to get out, I hear a screech.

"Oh my god! Get away from me! Jonathan!" I hear Jace yell and I get out of the bathroom to see what got him so scared. I go to my room and see Clary staring at Jace surprised and Jace is staring at her extremely scared.

"What the hell is going on?" I ask. They both turn to look at me.

"Get it away from me!" Jace panics, while pointing at Clary. That's when I realize what's going on. Jace is scared of Clary, because she has red curly hair, and so do clowns. I burst out laughing. "This is not funny!" Jace yells.

"Yes it is!" I say still laughing. Clary just stands there, looking very confused.

"What's going on?" she asks.

"We were just watching Stephen King's 'It' and Jace is very scared of clowns," I explain and continue laughing.

"So..?" she asks, still not getting it.

"So, clowns have fuzzy red hair, like you! You have clown hair!" Clary's confused expression turns into a scowl.

"I don't have clown hair!"

"Then why is Jace so scared of you?" She doesn't say anything. She just glares me.

"Jace is such a wussy for being afraid of a girl like me." To prove her point, she goes closer to Jace and tries to touch him, but he backs away. Clary starts to laugh and I don't find this so funny anymore.

"Okay that's enough." I take her by the arm and drag her out of the room and close the door. I sit down next to a scared Jace and he immediately puts his arms around me.

"Why are you so afraid of clowns?" I ask and tentatively put my arms around him.

"I don't know. They just really creep me out."

I decide to leave it at that and turn on the TV. I see that I forgot to turn off the DVD player so the movie is still playing, showing the clown. Jace quickly buries his face on my shoulder.

"Why did you do that?!" he asks and I quickly turn off the DVD player and the TV channels go on.

"Sorry! I forgot it was still on. You can look now." He turns his face towards the TV, but his head still rests on my shoulder.

That is how we stay the whole night since neither of us can sleep. His closeness surprises me completely. I have no idea why he's been like that tonight. Not that I complain.

We watch TV and talk once in a while. Before I know it, it's time to go to school. I notice that Jace has fallen asleep. I hate to have to wake him up since he looks so peaceful, his head still on my shoulder.

"We have to go to school soon. Do you want some breakfast?" He just tightens his arms around me and mumbles something. "Jace, wake up," I try again, but he doesn't move. I unwrap his arms and then shake him by his shoulders. He then opens his eyes.

"I don't want to get up. I'm so tired. Do we need to go to school?" He yawns and stretches.

"Yes we do. We skipped school yesterday. Let's get some breakfast and coffee." He groans and covers his face with his hands.

"Fine," he mumbles into his hands, but doesn't get up.

"Am I gonna have to drag you or are you going to get up?"

"Fine!" He gets up and we go downstairs. We eat breakfast and go to his car.

"So… Who is your victim going to be today?" I ask while he's driving.

"I think I'm too tired to think about anything like that today." Well, that's surprising. Usually it seems like nothing is stopping him. "What about you? Are you going to have a little fun with Sebastian again?" He smirks.

"I thought we already agreed that he's a jerk. And I think it's just gonna be a one-time thing."

"So what if he's a jerk? You can always have a little fun." I just shake my head. "Unless…"

"Unless what?" What on earth is he on about?

"Unless you have your eyes on someone else. Who is it?" This is not good. I feel my face heating up a little and I do my best to remain unaffected.

"There's no one."

"Are you sure about that?"

"Yes!"

"Whatever you say." He doesn't sound like he believed, but I'm relieved the conversation is over. "I _am_ gonna find out who it is sooner or later. So, you might wanna tell me now."

"If you don't stop that now, I'm going to get a human sized clown doll and put it in your room." After that he doesn't say a word during the whole drive to school.

We arrive to school and as we walk I see Sebastian waiting near the school entrance. He's lazily leaning on the wall and grinning at me. He's checking me out. I have to admit that he does look quite hot. But then again he can never look as hot as Jace.

"Your admirer is waiting for you," Jace whispers to me amused.

"Shut up."

As we're about to get in, Sebastian grabs my arm and stops me. Jace walks inside without me.

"What do you want?"

"You," he answers, smiling darkly.

"That wasn't cliché at all," I say sarcastically.

"Meet me behind the school after school."

"No." I'm very tempted to say yes, but it feels wrong towards Jace. Even though he may never feel the same.

"Why? Still hanging on Jace? He's not into you that way and never will be."

"I know." I sigh defeated.

"So will you meet me today?" he insists. His face is getting closer and I can feel his breath on my face. I have this strange urge to just grab him and kiss him.

"I can't. I have things to do," I lie.

"What about tomorrow?"

"Maybe," I say and walk away from him and go inside the school. I go to my locker which is next to Jace. I lean my back against it and sigh.

"Did you have a hot make-out session?" Jace asks smirking at me.

"No."

"Aw. Why not? Did you break up?" he teases.

"No, because there is nothing to break."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes!"

"Whatever you say."

* * *

><p>"Jonathan, it's going to get me," Jace mumbles to his desk. He fell asleep in class and his head is resting on his desk. Seems like he's having a nightmare of the clown. He's not speaking very loudly and we're sitting at the back, so the teacher doesn't hear him. I try to wake him up by poking him with a pen.<p>

"Jonathan, help. It's coming out of the TV." He's probably dreaming that the clown is climbing out of the television. I imagine if he'd be dreaming about 'City Of Boners' and there would be a giant penis coming out of the TV. I snort loudly at the mental image and the teacher turns to glare at me.

"Is something funny, Mr. Morgenstern?" The whole class turns to look at me.

"No," I answer firmly. Unfortunately his gaze turns to Jace and he looks at him disapprovingly.

"Could you do me a favor and wake Mr. Herondale up?"

I shake Jace more firmly and he bolts to sit up. The look on his face is very frightened.

"Detention, both of you," the teacher says and continues his teaching.

Class ends soon and we walk out of the classroom. It was our last class and we should go to detention now, but Jace is so tired that I don't think he will actually go.

"Should we just go home and not go to the detention? I mean we're both really tired." Jace yawns and nods in response. We start to walk quickly out of the school.

"How did you even get detention?"

"I snorted too loud."

"Was I really that funny sleeping?"

"No it was not that. I just had this funny image in my head."

"What funny image?" he asks amused.

"Nothing."

We walk fast to his car and he drives off. We both sigh in relief.

"Do you wanna come over to my place? I think we would just fall asleep if we would go both home. Then we wouldn't be able to sleep the following night either."

"That sounds like a good idea."

* * *

><p><strong>Things get more interesting in the next chapter...<strong>


	6. Chapter 6

**There's some Jace POV in this chapter**

* * *

><p>"What <em>did<em> Sebastian want this morning?" Jace asks as we sit on his living room couch.

"He wanted to meet me after school."

"Why didn't you say so? I could've waited or you could've caught a ride with him." If only he would know. Or no, I don't want him to know how I feel. Ever. It would be the end of this friendship. I still want to see him, even if it's just as a friend. It's that or nothing.

"I didn't want to."

"Why not? Oh, that's right! There's someone else." He tries to study me, like he could figure out who it is. He's staring at me so intently that I have to turn away.

"No, there's no one," I try to convince him.

"But I can see that there clearly is. Why can't you tell me? We've been friends for six years, so I think you should be able to tell me whoever it is."

He's so oblivious, but I'm glad. I'll be doomed if he ever finds out. I've created many horrible scenes in my head of how it would go. I imagine he would be disgusted that his longtime friend suddenly feels that way about him. Or maybe he would just laugh, like when I told him about my dream.

As I'm thinking about this stuff, I feel my eyelids getting heavy. I hear Jace calling my name, but I'm already drifting to sleep.

* * *

><p>I wake up and feel that I'm lying on top of someone. Someone very warm. Someone who has hard muscles under his shirt. I open my eyes fast and see that I'm lying on top of Jonathan. That should make me bolt up fast. I should be disgusted to lie on top of my best friend who is also a guy. For some reason I'm not.<p>

I also should've been disgusted to be so close to him last night while I was terrified of the clown, but I wasn't. I don't' know what's going on with me. I feel like my body always seeks to be close to his body. That's especially when we sleep. There have been a lot of times lately that I've woken up from his bed and my arms were around him.

It hasn't been like that before. I don't know how everything changed. He's my friend and I shouldn't want to cuddle him.

I look down at my sleeping best friend who I'm still lying on top of. He's still sleeping peacefully. I should let him sleep since he was so tired that he fell asleep while we were talking. But then again he won't be able to sleep at night if I let him sleep too much.

I feel like I don't want to get up. His body feels so warm pressed against mine. I'm suddenly a bit freaked out about all this and get up carefully, trying not to wake him up. He cannot know I was just lying on top of him.

"JONATHAN, WAKE UP!" I yell to his ear and he bolts up fast. He looks at me wide eyes and I start to laugh at his startled expression.

"What the hell was that for?"

"You needed to wake up." I smile innocently at him.

"Why? And why did you yell at my ear? I could've gone deaf!" He glares.

"You do hear me just fine. You needed to wake so you'll be able to sleep at night. Or did you forget that that is why we came here."

"Yeah, but you could've woken me up nicely."

"Like how? Kissed you awake like a sleeping beauty?" I smirk at him. He rolls his eyes.

"Whatever."

"Do you want me to drive you home?" A part of me hopes he would like to stay the night. I always sleep better when he's there. It's weird, so maybe I do want him to go home.

"So eager to get rid of me?"

"No, of course not. I just asked."

"I'm just kidding. But yeah, I guess I could go home."

I drive Jonathan home and the drive back to mine. Before I know it, it's night and I can finally go to sleep. But the sleep won't come as I lie wide awake in my bed. I try to think of something else, but my thoughts go always back to Jonathan.

If he'd be here I could wrap my arms around him and I would feel peaceful and warm. I couldn't get a girlfriend for that. It wouldn't be the same. I haven't known any of them for that long. They don't feel safe.

This is exactly why I can't sleep. I think too much and my body craves for Jonathan. I cover my face with my hands. This is all so stressful.

* * *

><p>One month passes by fast. I feel strange things towards Jonathan. I don't understand this. One day I notice how well his tight jeans fit his long legs. Other day I want to run my hands down his hot muscles. I'm officially freaked out.<p>

Sometimes I feel a twinge of jealousy when I see or hear what Jonathan does with Sebastian. He always says they're just messing around, but I don't believe him. I continue messing around with girls. It's a great distraction from these strange feelings, but I'm not as into it as I was before.

Right now I'm waiting for Jonathan in my car in front of his house. He's late and I'm getting pissed off. Soon he hurries out of the door and runs inside the car.

"Sorry I'm late." I wait for him to continue, to explain why he's late.

"And… Why are you late?" I ask a bit angry.

"Sorry! I just didn't sleep well." He looks apologetic, but somehow I feel very mad today.

"Why? Had a hot night with Sebastian?" Normally I would joke about things like that to him, but things are changing.

"No! Of course not! He hasn't been in my house and I haven't been in his. Like I've said before, we're just messing around. Why do you even care so much?"

"I don't know. I'm sorry. I've been on the edge lately." I've been snapping at him from small things lately.

"Why? Has something happened?" he asks worried.

"No. I wish I could relax. And that is exactly why I decided to throw a party at my place tomorrow night, since my parents are on a business trip." I grin at him.

"Awesome!" he exclaims happily.

* * *

><p>It's Saturday evening and my house is packed up with people. Music is coming loudly from the stereos. I'm sitting in a couch and there's some random girl sitting on my lap. She just came there and I don't really feel like messing with her.<p>

My concentration is somewhere else. Jonathan is sitting on a couch opposite of me. Sebastian is practically sitting on him. I take another sip from my cup that's filled with alcohol. I'm already pretty drunk, but I don't feel any better. I feel worse.

I look at Jonathan's full lips as he's talking to Sebastian. God, I want to kiss him.

I jump off the couch as the thought crosses my mind, pushing the girl off my lap to the ground. There's something seriously wrong with me. I need more alcohol. I walk to kitchen to get some. I'm so glad no one's there. I fill my cup to the fullest and take a big gulp.

I put my hands on the kitchen counter and put my head down. I'm so frustrated and confused.

* * *

><p>"Wanna go over to my place?" Sebastian slurs to my ear. Tempting, but no. I really wanna go check on Jace, he's been acting so strange lately and I'm worried about him. He just got up from the couch and left.<p>

"Not really. I'll be right back." I tell him and he looks at me confused. I quickly get up and go to the direction Jace went. I find him in the kitchen, looking absolutely miserable.

"Is something wrong?" I ask him and he looks up. His face is pained, but he starts to smile as soon as he realizes it's me.

"Jonathan! I missed you!" He comes closer and hugs me. I automatically hug him back. What's wrong with him?

"I didn't go anywhere."

"I still missed you. Don't leave me." How drunk is he?

"I think you've had enough to drink for tonight." He's still clinging on to me and doesn't let go. "Let's get you to bed, okay?"

"Okay," he says in a small voice. This is not the Jace I know. Something is definitely bothering him.

I drag him upstairs to his room. I push him down to his bed and sit down on the edge.

"Are you going to be okay if I go back?" I would feel bad for leaving him here, but I did say to Sebastian that I'd be right back. Not that I really care.

"No! Don't go. Stay here with me," he pleads and pulls me down to lie with him. We both lie on our sides and look at each other. It looks like there's something different about the way he looks at me.

"Has something happened? Why are you acting so differently?" He looks at me for a while before answering.

"I can't tell you." His answer surprises completely. He should be able to tell me if something's wrong.

"Why not? Come on, you can tell me." He shakes his head. He stares at me again with that weird glint in his eyes. His lips part and his breathing gets heavier. "Jace?" I look down at his parted lips and I want to kiss him so badly right now. My feelings just can't get away. They only become stronger day by day.

Suddenly Jace inches closer to me. He comes as close as he can, his body tightly pressed against mine. I have no idea what he's thinking, but I don't care. I want him so much.

He leans his face closer and his nose bumps with mine. Both of our breathing is heavy. He wraps his other arm around me and I tangle my hand in his hair. This is like a dream come true, but it only needs one more thing and I'm waiting if he'll do it. And he does.

He brings his lips to mine passionately. I can't help but moan. He kisses me with so much passion that I wonder if he has wanted to do this for a while. I certainly have wanted to do this for a long time and I waste no time showing him that.

I lick his lips and he eagerly meets my tongue with his. He turns us so he's on top of me. I push my hands under his shirt and feel up his hard muscles. He groans sexily against my mouth.

We continue kissing passionately for a while, like we can't get enough of each other. He pulls away and starts kissing my neck and now it's my turn to groan.

Soon he rests his head on my chest and I'm left speechless. Did that just happen or am I going to wake up on the couch next to Sebastian? I hope not. I don't want Sebastian, I want Jace.

"Jace?" I say, but he doesn't move. He fell asleep. I wonder if he's going to remember that in the morning. And if he is, will he regret it?

I roll him to lie on his back and he keeps sleeping. I wonder if I should leave and pretend it didn't happen or if I should stay and see what happens in the morning. I guess I should stay. I'm too tired to go home anyway.

I wrap my other arm around Jace and lean my head on his shoulder. He has to have some feelings for me if he did what he just did. But he was pretty drunk.

Soon I feel Jace's arms wrapping around me tightly. I feel so peaceful and safe, that I don't even mind the music coming from downstairs as I fall asleep.


	7. Chapter 7

I wake up and feel Jace's arms around me. He's still sleeping and I carefully separate from him. I have no idea if he'll remember what happened last night. What would he think if he would remember? I don't even really know what he was thinking last night when he kissed me. Did he do it because he actually wanted or did he just want to experiment?

I anxiously watch as he begins to wake up. Jace opens his eyes and looks at me. He frowns in confusion.

"What are you doing in here?" I guess he doesn't remember.

"I brought you here when you were too drunk and I didn't have a ride home. I was tired, so I stayed." Sure I could've caught a ride with Sebastian, but I rather just stay here.

"I don't remember anything. I feel like there's something I should remember. What happened last night?" he asks and rubs circles on his temples.

"What's the last thing you remember?"

"I was sitting on a couch, drinking and there was some girl on my lap. What happened after that?" Like I would tell him. He'd probably freak out if I'd tell him that we kissed. There's a chance that he might remember it later, then again maybe not.

"I found you in the kitchen and it seemed like you weren't alright. I noticed that you were very drunk, so I dragged you here and then you collapsed on your bed and passed out." _But before you passed out, you dragged me down with you and we had a very passionate make out session_, I wanted to add and see what his reaction would be. It would probably be hilarious.

"That's it? I feel like there's more. Are you sure that's all that happened?" He's still rubbing his temples, like that would help him remember. I have a sudden urge to get the hell out of here if he does.

"Yep, that's all. I think I'm gonna go now. You probably have a massive hangover." He sits up on the bed.

"You don't have to go. I think my hangover will get better if my best friend is here." He smiles at me hopefully. I can't say no to him!

"Fine, I'll stay. What do you wanna do? Do you need a painkiller?"

"Yes, please. It's in the nightstand." I take the painkillers from there and give it to him. He takes it without water.

"I could've gotten you water."

"No, it's fine. I really needed that right now. That's how bad my hangover is." And he still wants me here.

"Are you sure you don't want to be alone? Like sleep away the hangover?"

"No. I want to have you here."

"How are you feeling? I mean, are you still feeling angry or like you'll snap at me at any moment?" I feel like there's something he's not telling me. There has to be a reason why he's been acting like that.

"No." He frowns in confusion. "I'm actually feeling lighter today. What the hell happened last night?" he asks more himself than me.

We spend the day talking, eating hangover food and watching movies. I notice how he's frowning once in a while, like he's still trying to remember what happened and I'm sitting stiffly beside him in panic. I have no idea what would happen if he'd suddenly remember.

* * *

><p>After dropping off Jonathan to his house, I'm still trying to figure out why I feel so different. I'm almost positive there's something he's not telling me or doesn't know that happened last night.<p>

I feel so much lighter today. I'm not angry and or anything. I was really drunk last night. I hope I didn't do anything stupid. I'm scared of what it is that I should remember. It felt like Jonathan wasn't telling me the whole truth.

I walk upstairs to my room and collapse on my bed. That's when a flashback hits me like a lightning. I collapsed to this same spot on the bed. Jonathan sat down and I dragged him down next to me. I stared at his black eyes. I inched my body closer to his and then we kissed.

My eyes go wide. I can't believe this! I can't believe I kissed Jonathan! What the hell am I supposed to do now?

How did this happen? I kissed my best friend! I definitely know I enjoyed kissing him very much. I don't know what I feel for him. I mean, I've had these feelings for him for a while, but this changes everything. It confirms that I definitely have feelings for Jonathan. Does he feel the same way? He did kiss me just as eagerly as I kissed him. But what if he has feelings for Sebastian?

All these thoughts make me so tired and I just wanna sleep overnight and see what happens tomorrow. The last thing I think is how happy I am to see Jonathan tomorrow.

* * *

><p>I wait outside Jonathan's house in my car. I guess I was too eager to see him so I came too early. I wonder if I should tell him that I remember. Maybe I'll talk to him after school, so we'll have more time to talk. I'm very nervous.<p>

After a while Jonathan walks through the door and I feel like I'm seeing him for the first time. I notice how handsome he actually is and also beautiful in a manly kind of way. I notice how well his clothes fit his hot body. I want to run my hands all over him. I wanna kiss him, so badly. I want to run my fingers through his silky white-blond hair.

He comes inside the car and I really need to calm down my thoughts. I wonder if there's a chance he could possibly have these kinds of thoughts about me.

"Morning!" I say probably too cheerfully.

"Morning," he answers warily, confused. So I was too cheery. "Why are you so happy?"

"Why? Did you like me better when I was grumpy?"

"No! I'm just curious. Got a hot date or something?" Is it my wishful thinking or does he sound a bit jealous?

"Something like that." I smile, teasing him.

I drive us to school and we get out of the car. I'm still smiling, like I've been smiling the whole morning. My smile is wiped of my face as I see Sebastian grinning at Jonathan and waiting for him near the school entrance. Great, just fucking great!

"Are you going to greet your boyfriend?" I try to sound light, but I don't know if I succeed very well.

"He's not my boyfriend!" he hisses.

"No? Then what exactly is he to you?"

"He's just fun to mess around with. I've told you before." I can tell he's getting pissed off, but that doesn't stop me.

"Why don't you date him?" I'm actually curious. Then I remember. There was someone else. I wonder if that someone else could be me. But then again, maybe I would've noticed if he would have feelings for me. I wonder if our kiss was just 'messing around' for him.

"Because things are good just like this and I don't think he would even want to be seriously with me." I really don't like to hear him talk about Sebastian. So, why the fuck am I questioning him about it?

We walk towards the entrance and I see Jonathan being pulled away, probably by Sebastian. I get curious and sneak around the corner I saw him go. What I see makes me regret my decision. Sebastian pulls Jonathan into a passionate kiss and he doesn't pull away. Why would he?

I get angry. I also feel betrayed. Just couple of days ago he was kissing me like that. I did kiss him first, but it felt like we weren't just messing around. I put all my feelings into that kiss and I felt like he did too. But now I clearly see he didn't. It's like now that he realized that he likes guys too, he can just go around kissing everybody.

I quickly walk inside the school and go to my locker. I get even worse headache than what I had when I had a hangover. I lean against my locker and close my eyes.

"Are you alright?" asks a familiar voice. If it would be anyone else I would send them away. I open my eyes and see green eyes looking up at me with concern. If Clary wouldn't be Jonathan's sister, I might use her as a distraction right now.

"No, not really." She leans into the locker next to me.

"Yeah, me neither. Did you have a fight with Jonathan or..?"

"No, but it has something to do with Jonathan. What about you?"

"Aline," she says and points her finger at something. I turn my head and see Aline kissing with some blonde girl. "You know, it makes me wonder if there's something wrong with me. I mean we have kissed a few times in my house or her house, but she has always said she doesn't want anyone to know. But how does that look like to you?"

I feel really bad for Clary. It's like we're almost in a same situation. Except that we really aren't. Who wouldn't want her? I mean, she's cute and pretty. And she has those very beautiful green eyes. Right now those eyes gaze up at me with a sad expression.

"There's nothing wrong with you. If it makes you feel any better, I thought once that you could be my next lucky victim, but then I saw you with Aline. So, I thought I better not try anything. Not that Jonathan would've let me." I smile at her and she smiles back. It makes me feel better to know that I brightened up someone's day even a little bit.

"Thanks, Jace," she says and hugs me and I hug her back. We separate and she's still smiling. "You know, I could have a little fun with you if you wouldn't be Jonathan's friend." Then I get an idea that won't leave my head. If she's miserable and I'm miserable, then maybe…

That's when an image of Sebastian and Jonathan kissing flashes in my mind. I see Aline and that girl still kissing. I get angry for both of us. I just want to feel better.

I turn to look at Clary and my eyes land on her plump pink lips. They're almost as inviting as her brother's lips. She looks at me as if she knows that I'm thinking of kissing her. She doesn't look shocked, she looks like she wants it too.

I put my other hand on her small waist and draw her closer. She puts her hands on my hair. I slowly lean down and our lips meet. I kiss her softly and carefully. The kiss isn't filled with sexual desire or immense passion. It's more like a way to console each other. Our kiss is gentle, comforting and caring. It feels nice.

But too soon I'm being ripped away from my comfort. I don't even have to look to know who it is. I turn to look at him anyways and meet raging angry black eyes. I've never been afraid of Jonathan's strange black eyes, but right now…

Thankfully the bell rings at that moment and everyone else gets in class.

"I swear it's not what it looks like. I'm _not _using your sister," I try to plead, but it isn't working.

"Then what the hell _are _you doing?! You always just use people and throw them away." People? He didn't say I use girls, he said people. Jonathan then turns to Clary. "And you. Why? You knew about… You knew and you do this!" Knew what?

"I'm sorry! It really isn't what it looks like! We were kissing because both of us felt bad and we were just comforting each other. Nothing more. I promise." Jonathan calms down a bit. He turns to look at me.

"Why did you need comfort? You were just peachy this morning." I see the rage coming back a little in his eyes.

"I can't tell you, at least not now. We'll talk after school, okay?" That's when Sebastian steps in. I didn't even notice he was still here. Seeing his face makes me angry.

"No, he can't. He has other plans." Sebastian answers before Jonathan gets a chance. I start boiling with anger. My anger is probably matching Jonathan's.

Jonathan turns to look at Sebastian. "No, I don't," Jonathan says. Sebastian's grin turns into a scowl. Clary must be freaking terrified since she's surrounded by three very angry guys.

"Still?! Are you kidding me?! I thought you'd be over-" Sebastian says, but Jonathan interrupts him.

"SHUT UP!" Jonathan yells frantically and angrily at him. But he doesn't shut up.

"Why should I? Even if he would know, he wouldn't want y-" Once again he gets stopped by Jonathan.

"SHUT THE FUCK _UP_!" he says and throws a punch on Sebastian's face. The punch is so strong that it throws him lying down on the floor. I guess my day just got a little better. Although I am a bit confused of what Sebastian was talking about and why Jonathan reacted like that.

I look at Clary and see that her face is a mix or shock and amusement. She goes to help Sebastian up from the floor. She grabs his arm and drags him away from me and Jonathan.

Jonathan is looking down at the floor, avoiding looking at me.

"So, you're free after school? I really need to talk to you." My pleading voice makes him raise his head and look at me. My heart starts to beat faster and it's not from fear this time. This time his black eyes don't look scary, but soft.

"Okay. I guess I kind of need to talk to you too."

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><p><strong>Sorry about the Clace moment, I just put it there to add some drama. So don't worry, this is not gonna turn into a Clace fic<strong>

**Thank you OnlyOneToBlame for that wonderful review :) And no, I won't stop writing this until it's finished**

**And thanks also everyone else who reviews, favorites, follows or reads this story :) It's not getting really that much attention, so all that means very much to me**


	8. Chapter 8

**Thank you all for the lovely reviews :)**

**Things will get even more interesting in this chapter...**

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><p>The drive to my house is quiet and tense. All I can think about is what upset Jace so much that he kissed my sister and what does he want to talk about.<p>

I'm still fuming inside. The image of him and Clary kissing is tattooed in my mind. I'm mad at both of them. Clary knew about my feelings for Jace and yet she kisses him.

And Jace… How could he think that he'd have a right to kiss my sister? You can't just go ahead and kiss your best friend's sister. What on earth happened in that small amount of time that could have set him off?

We soon arrive to my house and we go straight to my room. Right after he closes the door, I start to interrogate him.

"What the hell was so bad that you needed to kiss my sister?" It's impossible to keep the anger away from my voice. He sits down at the edge of my bed and I angrily tower over him. He looks very regretful.

"This isn't exactly easy to say."

"Did something happen?" I try to help him, because whatever he's trying to tell me seems to be hard to get out.

"Yes," he simply says. I give him a waiting look.

"And…" I push him on.

"I can't do this," he says and puts his head in his hands. "This is so embarrassing!"

What can possibly be so bad that he can't tell that to me? I sit down next to him. I'm not so mad at him anymore. I'm more concerned.

"You can tell me," I say softly and tentatively put my hand on his shoulder. He raises his head and looks at me in the eyes. There's a moment of silence before he speaks.

"I saw you kiss Sebastian," he finally says and turns his head away. I frown in confusion.

"You know about me and him. Why would it make you feel bad to see us kissing?" Jace doesn't answer. He just looks down. "Jace?"

"I remembered last night what happened before I passed out," he says quietly, still not looking at me. My eyes widen. "Why didn't you tell me?" he asks.

"How could I just blurt out something like that?"

"Maybe you have a point." I wait for him to continue, maybe to tell me why he got upset, but he doesn't.

"So, why did you get upset seeing me kissing with Sebastian?"

It takes him a while to answer. "If I tell you, it might ruin our friendship." I'm very confused. What could be so awful that it could ruin us? I don't think anything can keep me away from him.

"It won't. Trust me. Nothing you say can keep me away from you." He looks at me again. He searches my face, to find out if I'm being serious.

He takes a deep breath before speaking. "I got really mad, because I saw the way you kissed him. It was the same way you kissed me." I'm left speechless. Why would he care if I kissed Sebastian the same way I kissed him? Not that it would be true. Kissing Sebastian is nothing compared to kissing Jace.

"Why did you kiss me?" I have completely forgotten to ask the most important question.

"Because I wanted to."

"Why did you want to kiss me? Did you just think it would be fun or..?" A little bit of angriness seeks to my voice.

"No, of course not. You remember how I was angry almost all the time lately?" I nod. "It was because I started to have these strange feelings and I was so frustrated."

"What kind of strange feelings?" I'm still utterly confused. I feel so oblivious. I feel like there are so many hints, but I can't figure out what the hell he's talking about.

"Strange feelings about you." Jace looks at me as if waiting for me to react some way. He couldn't possibly be talking about the same kind of feelings I've been having for him.

"Can you be more specific?" My heart starts beating faster. Could he possibly feel the same way about me?

"Are you sure you want to know? You can't say I didn't warn you."

"Yes!" I say impatiently.

"Okay. Um… I guess it started when I noticed how I had lately snuggled you in my sleep. I think one day I just realized that there might be a reason why I do that. I first didn't think it could be true. But then the feeling got stronger by the day, especially at the night of the party when I wanted to kiss you. That's when I realized that I have feelings for you."

I look at him my eyes wide open, astonished. I can't believe I'm hearing this. All this time I have thought that it would be impossible for him to have any feelings for me. But now he is the one to confess his feelings, when I've been too much of a coward to do so.

"Wh- What?" I have to make sure I heard him right. He winces.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said-" He stops to stare at me surprised as I put my hand to cup his cheek. I close the distance between us and press my lips against his. He seems surprised first, but then starts to kiss me back.

The kiss isn't like the heated kiss we had the other night. It's slow and gentle. It feels so amazing to feel his soft lips move against mine. It's even better than I always dreamed it would be like. It's better than the kiss last night, since I know now that he really wants this too.

We exchange few small pecks and then separate. I lean my forehead against his and look him in the eyes. We stay like that for a while, just looking at each other.

"So… Does this mean you feel the same way or..?" Jace asks uncertainly. I give him a small kiss before responding, because I just can't keep away from him now that I can actually kiss him.

"Yes. I've had feelings for you since the day I had the dream." He smiles and looks surprised.

"Really? That long? How did I not notice?"

"I did a pretty good job keeping my feelings hidden," I say and kiss him again.

"It must've been really hard," Jace says and runs his hand through my hair.

"It was. I was pretty freaked out and I didn't know what to do."

"I had the same. This is really weird now that you think about it. I mean I never would've thought I would be in this kind of situation with you." He chuckles.

"I know!" I laugh. I then come up with an important question. "So what do you wanna do now that we're in this situation? Do you still wanna be just friends or do you want something more?" I can't just simply assume that he'd want to jump into a relationship with me. Even I haven't given much thought about it. But I do know that I want more.

"I definitely don't want to be just friends, but I'm not sure what I want. This is big change. I've always liked girls and now I suddenly like my best friend who's a guy. I know that I want you."

"Then maybe we could just be more than friends and let things happen like they do."

"That sounds like a good idea. I do want some rules though. I don't want you to be with Sebastian anymore."

"After today I wouldn't even want to have anything to do with him. And if it's not too much to ask for, could you not see any girls? I'm not sure if I can do this if I have to see you making out with them." He smiles and kisses me.

"Of course. Why would I need a girl now that I can make out with you?" He smirks.

"I would never in million years imagine you saying that," I say and chuckle.

"I know!" he laughs. "Where is this world going?" I collapse back to the bed laughing. Soon Jace follows.

I turn to look at him and see him already looking at me.

"Do you wanna stay the night?" I ask.

"Yes. I sleep better with you anyways." He smiles and strokes my hair gently.

"Me too."

I roll on top of him.

"Are you sure sleeping is all you want to do?" he asks, looking up at me.

"No and it's not even that late yet, so maybe we could try something," I say seductively.

"I would definitely want to try whatever you have in mind," he answers, his tone matching mine.

I press my lips to his roughly to show exactly what I have in mind. He moans and entwines his finger in my hair. I run my hands all over his body. He licks my lips and I greet his tongue with mine. We passionately kiss and lick and touch each other's for a while, a long while. When it doesn't seem to be enough anymore, I start to grind against him. We both groan and our kisses become even more frantic.

After a moment, we have to separate for air and I take this moment to remove his shirt. I explore his chest muscles and his abs while slowly grinding against him. His eyes are hooded and we're both breathing hard.

"You're so sexy," I say breathily, staring down at him.

"I know," he says cockily and I chuckle.

I can feel that he's as hard as I am right now. I just want to rip off the rest of our clothes and see what happens then. I just don't know if he's quite ready for that.

He takes my shirt off and starts to explore my body. When I can't take it anymore, I kiss him again. We wrap our arms around each other, desperate to feel the skin on skin contact. And it feels so damn great.

I feel him trying to open the button of my jeans and I pull away to look at him.

"Are you sure you want to go that far?" I ask him and he looks at me like I'm crazy.

"Are you kidding me? Of course I do! And I can feel you do too." He grins sexily at me and I swear I just got harder.

I think we both know that we aren't going to go all the way right now, but there are other things we can do.

He rolls us around so he's on top of me. He goes back to opening my jeans and pulls them off swiftly. He then takes off his own jeans.

Jace kisses my neck. He starts to move down and presses kisses on my chest. He licks my abs all the way down to the waistband of my boxers. My breathing gets harder the lower he goes.

He takes my boxers off and my hard cock springs free. He wastes no time as he starts to stroke it.

"Oh fuck, Jace," I moan.

"You like that?" Jace asks sexily and strokes me faster. He's staring at me so fiercely.

"Yes," I breathe out.

Suddenly he slows down his motions and it looks like he's pondering about something. I find out just what he was pondering as he takes the head of my cock into his mouth. I let out a loud groan. I definitely did not expect for him to do that.

Jace tries to take more and more of me into his mouth. I know he won't be able to get it all in, it is quite big. But he is doing amazing job with his licking and sucking. He must have had a lot of blowjobs from all those girls. Not that it would make him good at it, just to let him know what feels good.

I feel that I'm close as he sucks, licks and strokes me fast.

"I'm gonna cum," I warn him, because I don't know if he wants to take it in his mouth or not.

He just goes faster. Then he looks me in the eyes. That's enough to trigger me to cum.

"Oh, Jace!" I moan loudly as I come hard in his mouth. He swallows all of it.

He gives me a one last suck and then crawls back to lie beside me, his head resting on my shoulder. I'm still breathing hard. He looks up at me, smirking.

"Did you like that?"

"You were fucking amazing." I probably shouldn't feed his big ego, but he was just so fucking good.

"Well, it was my first time doing that."

He lifts his head from my shoulder and kisses me. I can feel his hard-on rubbing against me. He has taken off his boxers at some point. I should definitely do something about it.

He looks at me and smiles. I smile right back at him and stroke his hair gently.

"I think there's something I need to take care of," I say and kiss him.

"You think?" he mumbles against my lips and rubs his hard-on against my thigh. I roll us around so he's lying on his back and I'm lying on my stomach beside him. I kiss him hard and take his dick in my hand and start to stroke it. He groans into the kiss.

I break the kiss and see his gold eyes filled with pleasure as I continue to stroke him. I start to move down while kissing his chest and abs. Then I'm at eye level of his hard cock and it's just as amazing as the rest of his body. I don't hesitate as I take him in my mouth.

"Oh, fuck," Jace moans loudly. I really hope Clary hasn't come home yet, because she has definitely heard everything.

I suck him hard and I'm able to take more and more inside each time. I'm not being able to take all of him inside my mouth either, since he is probably as big as me. I can still see that he's enjoying it very much, groans and grunts coming out of him.

I lick and suck him hard and fast. He's tightly gripping my hair and moaning repeatedly. Soon he warns me he's about to come and I move even faster and harder, eager to get his cum in my mouth.

I look up at him and see him looking at me with extreme pleasure.

"Jonathan!" Jace yells as he comes in my mouth. I swallow all of his cum, and there's a lot of it. I lick him completely clean and then go lie down next to him.

He's breathing hard, still coming down from his high.

"That was… Wow," he says breathlessly.

"I know," I say smugly. He looks at me smiling.

"Well, you have done that before, haven't you? With Sebastian?"

"No, we never got that far. I guess I was kind of feeling like I was betraying you. Even though I was almost positive you didn't have any feelings for me." Jace looks a bit relieved for the fact that I haven't done that with Sebastian.

I rest my head on his chest and wrap my arms around him.

"Well, you did an excellent job for a first time. It was mind blowing," Jace says and I smile smugly.

"I really hope no one is home, because they definitely heard everything."

"Your parents are rarely home and I haven't heard Clary coming in either." That makes me wonder where she is. She usually comes straight home after school. She's probably with her friends. "Imagine if your parents would've come for a surprise visit. They would've been in for a surprise to find their son giving a blowjob to his best friend," Jace laughs.

"That would've been awful," I say horrified. I don't even know how I'm going to tell them about Jace and me. I don't even know if I need to tell. I have no idea how serious Jace is about this or how deep his feelings are. My feelings are definitely very deep. I'm falling for him more and more all the time. But he just discovered his feelings.

"Are you okay?" he suddenly asks. He must've noticed the worry showing on my face.

"Yeah, I'm fine. No, I'm great," I smile at him. He smiles back and kisses me.

"Me too."


	9. Chapter 9

**Warning, there's violence at the end of this chapter.**

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><p>Jace and I are sitting on the living room couch after our really hot afternoon.<p>

"Do you think we should watch 'City Of Boners' again? You know, to see how to do all that stuff," Jace suggest. His head is resting on my shoulder and we're sitting very closely.

"I don't know. I don't think it's really that realistic. It's not like it's some gay sex education video. They just fucked. It didn't tell you how to prepare and stuff."

"Maybe we should then check online. Or ask Alec and Magnus," he says like it's the best idea ever, which I disagree.

"Don't you think it'd be a little awkward? How would you even do it? Just go and ask: 'How do you guys have sex?' No. I think we can just check online when we feel ready." Jace lifts his head from my shoulder to look at me, his face very close to mine.

"Maybe I already feel ready," he says in that sexy seductive tone. I crash my lips to his, but we separate immediately as we hear that the front door open. Clary steps into the living room and walks to sit down on the other couch.

It's already eight. I wonder where she's been.

"Where have you been?" I start to interrogate her. She stays quiet for a while and then answers.

"Um… With Izzy and Simon," she finally answers. I can tell she's lying. Something is going on, because her hair is a mess and her lips are swollen.

"Really? What were you doing?" I act like I believe her, because it's fun messing with her.

"We were… We went to the movies." I can see she's that getting a bit uncomfortable as she's trying to come up with lies and is squirming uncomfortably in her seat. I glance at Jace and see that he's trying hard not to laugh.

"What movie?"

"It was the new action movie."

"Well, it must've been 4D or something since your hair is all messy and your clothes are a bit disorientated." I hear Jace muffle a laugh. Clary's face goes all red.

"No, I decided to run home and it was a bit windy outside, so…" she tries to explain, but I'm tired of this game.

"Come on! Cut the crap! Who were you really with?"

"What are you talking about? I was with Iz-"

"No you weren't. Unless you had a hot make out session with Izzy or Simon…"

"I didn't have a hot make out session with anyone," she says fast.

"Yes you did! Come on, who was it?" She sighs and stays quiet for a moment.

"It was…" I hear her say some name, but it was a quiet mumble, so I didn't catch it.

"What was it?"

"Sebastian," she whispers.

"What?!" me and Jace say at the same time.

"This is exactly why I didn't want to tell you! I knew you would get all protective brother!" she yells.

"I'm not. I'm just surprised. I'm fine with it as long as you don't start anything with him."

Clary just looks away. You got to be kidding with me.

"Seriously? You're thinking about getting back together with him?"

"Yes! After you punched him, I took care of him and we talked. We both realized how much we missed each other. I felt bad for what Aline did and Sebastian wasn't happy with you either. So, one thing left to another and… Well, you know."

"I just don't want you to get hurt. I guess I can't control your life. I just have to let you make your own mistakes." Even if I would demand for her to not see him again, she would do it anyways. I can't control her. She's so stubborn.

"Wow, I didn't think it would've been that easy. If I would, then I would've just come straight through the door yelling 'Hey Jon, what's up? I just had sex with Sebastian! Have a great day!'"

My eyes nearly bulge out of my head.

"You had sex with him?!"

"Shit," I hear her mutter and she gets up and runs upstairs to her room.

"Well, this is awkward," I hear Jace say beside me. I almost forgot he was still here. I turn to look at him and smile. Just looking at him and hearing his voice makes me feel better. I guess it won't help even if I would start yelling at Clary or be mad.

I don't know what possesses me when I crush my lips with his and start kissing him passionately. Maybe it's just the fact that I've had to wait so long and now I can do all these things I've wanted.

Jace makes a surprised noise, but eagerly kisses me back. He pushes me down so I'm lying on my back on the couch and he's lying on top of me. We both run our hands over each other's bodies.

I push my tongue in his mouth and he moans. We're too concentrated on our make out session that we don't hear the footsteps of someone coming downstairs.

"Oh my god!" I hear Clary squeal. Shit.

We jump apart to face a very happy looking Clary.

"Finally! I knew you were gonna end up together!" She jumps up and down happy.

We just sit there staring at her awkwardly.

"Oh, I should probably leave you to it." She smirks and goes back to her room.

"Well this is awkward," I say.

"Hey! You stole my line! I said that like five minutes ago," Jace says mock offended.

"Shut up," I say and push him down on the couch and continue where we left off.

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><p>"Are you nervous?" I ask Jace as we arrive in the school parking lot next day.<p>

"Why would I be nervous?" he asks confused.

"Aren't you scared that someone is going to see that something is going on between us?"

He takes my hand and smiles.

"Of course no one is going to notice. Everything will be fine as long as we act like we normally do," he reassures me, but I don't feel calmer at all. I don't want him to act like he normally does.

I give him an angry look.

"If we're going to act like we normally do, that includes you being with girls and I thought we agreed that you wouldn't have any girls anymore."

"I didn't mean it like that," he rushes to explain. "Of course I remember what we talked about yesterday. I just meant that we'd act like we're just friends like we've always been."

He squeezes my hand that he's still holding and I relax. He puts his other hand on my cheek and quickly scans the area around the car. Then he leans up and gives me two small kisses on my lips.

"Too bad we can't do that at school," I say disappointed.

"I know. We should go before we're late."

We get out of the car and immediately every girls' head turns towards us. It's like they sensed that we arrived. Creepy.

This day is not going to be easy.

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><p>After a long day of avoiding girls, longing glances at each other and quick secret make out sessions in the bathroom, Jace and I are finally peacefully lying down in his bed. We're both lying on our sides and Jace is holding me from behind, he's warm body pressed tightly against my back. We stare outside the big window beside his bed. It shows a beautiful city lights in the dark evening.<p>

"You wanna go up to the roof?" Jace suddenly asks. His house is big. It has four floors. They have this beautiful roof that has been turned into a nice place to hang out and gaze at the amazing view of the city. It's kind of like a very big balcony. Except that it's a roof.

"Why?"

"Because it has a better view and don't you think it would be kind of romantic?"I start to laugh.

"What?" he demands.

"Jace Herondale being romantic?" I ask incredulously, still laughing slightly.

He chuckles and kisses my cheek.

"Just for you, babe," he whispers seductively in my ear. It is kind of hot, but he called me babe.

"Babe?" I ask.

"What else should I call you?"

"My name?"

"I want to be more romantic," he states innocently.

"And you consider calling me 'babe' romantic?"

"Yes, babe." I hear amusement in his voice. I roll my eyes.

"Are we going to the roof?" I feel him nod and we get up. He takes my hand and leads me to the roof.

He pulls me to sit down on the soft fluffy pillows. He puts the warm blanket around us both and we wrap our arms around each other.

We've been here many times during our friendship. It was always so cool to come up here and talk about stuff. Now it's different. I've never realized before how romantic this place could be. It's also a perfect place to think.

"If you knew that no one at school would judge us, if they knew we aren't just friends anymore, would you want us to be a real couple?" I just have to know if he's as serious with us as I am.

"Of course," he answers immediately and kisses my cheek. "But I know some of them could be really rude and maybe even worse than neither of us can predict. This is our last year in high school and I don't want to have bad memories from it. I'm sure everything will go just fine. It won't be long when it's over and we can be together freely."

"I guess so." I can't help but feel a bit afraid that something will go wrong. I refuse to think that now. Instead I want to enjoy this perfect moment with my secret boyfriend.

We cuddle and talk and kiss a lot. Time flies and then it's time to go to sleep. We go to Jace's bed, snuggle and kiss goodnight.

* * *

><p>"So, Jace. What's been up with you lately?" asks Raphael, one of the guys we sometimes hang out with. Right now we're eating lunch at school with them. I can almost feel Jonathan tense up next to me.<p>

"What do you mean?" I ask confused. I do have a pretty good idea what he's on about.

"I mean why haven't you had any girls lately? It's been like about two weeks already. People are starting to get suspicious. Either you are seeing someone or you suddenly turned gay. Which I highly doubt." He laughs at the idea. He'd definitely be one of the first ones to bully and judge me and Jonathan. He makes me sick.

I force a laugh.

"Yeah, imagine that. I just haven't had any time for that. I've been more concentrated on my studies since we're graduating in a few months." I make up a quick lie and hope that he'll buy it.

"I understand, but you can have some fun too. I know just the perfect girl. I'll be right back." He doesn't give me a chance to say no before he goes.

"Are you gonna go out with her?" I hear Jonathan's bitter voice whisper to me.

I turn to look at him and his beautiful face looks so angry. I wish I could just kiss away the anger.

"Of course not," I say equally quiet.

"Jace, this is Kaelie," Raphael says as he comes back. Next to him is a blonde girl that has way too much make-up and way too little clothes. Before I wouldn't have minded at all, but now I have to fight against the look of disgust that threatens to break into my face.

"Hi," I say awkwardly and Raphael looks at me puzzled.

"Hi," Kaelie says seductively and comes closer. I can feel the strong tension coming out of Jonathan. Kaelie just rudely comes and sits on my lap. Before I have the chance to push her off, Jonathan bolts off his seat and runs away.

I desperately stare at the direction he went to, but it would seem suspicious if I'd run off too. I'll explain it to him later. I'm sure he'll understand.

I push the rude bitch out of my lap. She just doesn't get the hint and sits down where Jonathan was sitting. I stare longingly at the direction where Jonathan went and listen to Kaelie's annoying voice.

* * *

><p>I walk out of my last class. I'm definitely gonna walk home. I'm still mad at Jace. I know I'm a little unfair, but I'm just so angry. He could've tried harder.<p>

"Jonathan, wait!" Jace yells as he runs after me. I don't stop, but he soon catches up on me.

I stop and turn to glare at him. He looks at me with desperation and it almost makes me give in.

We stand at the corner of the school, outside so no one will hear or see us.

"You need to understand that I didn't want to have her there. If I would've just completely ignored her they would've gotten suspicious."

"I'm just so sick of this hiding. And it makes me so angry to see you with some girl."

"There was nothing I could've done differently! I tried my best." I can see that he's losing his temper soon. I'm too angry to care.

"You could've tried harder!"

"How?! Should have I started yelling at her to not come closer or what? 'Cause that would not have been any suspicious!" he yells sarcastically.

"You didn't have to let her sit in your lap!"

"I didn't let her sit in my lap. She just came there by herself! You are being ridiculous! I can't take this anymore," Jace says and storms off.

I stare after him hopelessly. Did he mean that he can't take this argument anymore or us? I crouch down against the brick wall and put my head in my hands.

What am I gonna do now? I don't have to wonder for long before I hear footsteps coming towards me. First I think that Jace has come back to apologize. When I lift my head I see that it's not Jace. It's Raphael and his 'gang'. They look menacing. Did they just hear our argument?

They walk closer until they're all towering over me. Normally I wouldn't be scared of a little fight, but it's one against several other guys and most of them are bigger than me. I don't know yet if they're here to fight, but it doesn't look good.

"If you're wondering, yes we heard your little lovers' spat. I never would've thought that about you and especially not Jace. But you know what they say: 'Expect the unexpected'." With that he throws the first punch and soon all of them start kicking and punching me. I try to fight back, but it's hopeless.

I lie there curled up and take their kicks and punches, waiting to black out. Soon I feel like I'm about to pass out. The last thing I think before I lose consciousness, is how I just wish I can make it out alive.


	10. Chapter 10

**What is going to happen to Jonathan? I guess you just have to read and find out**

**There's Clary's POV in the beginning of this chapter and it's there for a reason**

* * *

><p>Sebastian and I walk out of the school after having some 'after school fun'. His muscular arm is wrapped around my body. He really makes me happy and I'm so glad that we're back together.<p>

"You want to come over to my place and continue our 'fun'?" he asks and I giggle.

"No. I can't. Jon would probably start interrogating me again if I'd come home late. Last time was so awkward."

He chuckles as we continue walking towards his car. We see some of Sebastian's friends going into their cars. Sebastian says a quick "hi" to them and then they're already in their cars, speeding off.

"Where are they rushing into?" I ask and Sebastian shrugs.

Just as we're in in his car and he starts the it, something catches my eye.

"Stop!" I yell and he turns off the car.

"What is it?"

I don't answer as I run out of the car, towards the bloody person slumped against one of the school's brick walls. I do have a pretty good idea who it is. I can already feel tears spilling out as I come closer to him.

I run towards my brother whose body is all beaten up and bloody. I crouch down next to him and soon Sebastian comes too.

"We need to get him to the hospital," I say desperately. I help Sebastian carry Jonathan into his car and soon we're driving fast to the hospital.

"What on earth happened? He looks like he's been beat up or something. Why would anyone even do that to him?" I ask, the tears spilling out uncontrollably.

"I have a pretty good suspicion. You know how we saw Raphael and others rush out of the parking lot? Maybe they found out about him and Jace."

I told Sebastian about Jonathan and Jace, because I trusted him to not tell anyone. After all, he does swing that way too.

It's possible that they could have hurt Jonathan. They seemed to be in such a hurry to get out of there. I get so angry at them. They have to pay for what they did. I'll make sure of it. And I'm sure Jonathan will too. He is going to survive. I refuse to think otherwise. I don't know what I'd do if I'd lose him.

We arrive in the hospital and take Jonathan inside. The nurses take him away from us and we sit down to wait anxiously.

* * *

><p>I feel awful. I shouldn't have just walked away from Jonathan, but I don't know what I would've done if the argument would've continued.<p>

I wonder how he got home. Did he have to walk? Now I feel even more awful. I should call him and apologize or something. But I don't even know what I should say! He was the one who overreacted.

It makes me insane to think that this one little argument could ruin our relationship if both of us are too stubborn to apologize. I should definitely go over to his place and apologize.

And that's what I do. In fifteen minutes I'm parking my car in front of his house. I get out of the car and go ring the doorbell. I wait, but no one comes to open it. I ring it again and still nothing. Where is he?

I take my phone out of my pocket and call him. I let it ring, but he doesn't answer. Either he's avoiding me or something might have happened to him. What if the argument caused him to do something stupid?

I start to get a little desperate as I try calling him over and over again. I decide to go back to my car. Maybe I should call Clary. She might know where he is. She isn't home either.

I find her number on my phone and call her. Thankfully she answers.

"Hello?" Her voice sounds a bit off.

"Hi, it's Jace. Do you know where Jonathan is?"

"Oh my god!" she exclaims. "I totally forgot to call you! I'm so sorry."

"What's going on?"

"I'm at the hospital. I had to bring Jonathan here because-" I hang up and start driving fast to the hospital.

As I'm driving there I think about how I shouldn't have hung up on Clary. I would know what happened to Jonathan. Actually I don't think it matters how serious it is what happened, I'd still rush there in a minute.

Soon I arrive in the hospital parking lot and park my car. I get out and run inside the hospital. I run to the reception desk. There's a young woman nurse, looking very bored.

"I need to find my friend," I say firmly and she lifts her head to look at me. Right away she gets into this flirting mode. I get really annoyed, because I do not have time for this.

"I'm sure your friend can wait. I have a break soon and we could go somewhere," she says suggestively. I roll my eyes in irritation.

"No. He really can't wait. Could you please tell me which floor he's in? His name is Jonathan Morgenstern."

"I'm sure he's just fine." Just then another nurse arrives and she gets up. "I can go to my break now. So how about we go-"

"I don't want to go anywhere with you! I just want to find my boyfriend!" I yell desperately. I've done awfully lot of yelling today.

"Your boyfriend?" she asks incredulously. "Well, I can't tell you now. I'm on a break," she says smugly and walks away. I tug my hair in frustration. The older nurse takes her place and I turn to her.

"Could you please tell me which floor my boyfriend is on?" I ask kindly.

"Of course. Sorry about her. What's his name?" she asks gently. This is how the service should be. I don't even know why they let people like that rude bitch work in here. They should fire her.

I tell her the name and she searches the information from the computer. As soon as she tells me where Jonathan is, I run to the elevator. As the elevator stops in the third floor I run to the waiting room and see Clary and Sebastian sitting there. I run to them and they look up.

"How is he? What happened? Can we go see him yet?" I ramble nervously.

"If you wouldn't have hung up on me you would know," Clary says a bit angry, but I can see how worried and sad she is. It makes me very nervous.

She pats the seat next to her and I sit down, waiting for her to explain what happened.

"Just as we were about to leave the school parking lot, I noticed someone slumped against the wall. I ran and I saw that it was Jonathan. He was unconscious and bloody. We quickly brought him here. We don't know what happened, but we're guessing that he was beaten up. Now we just have to wait for the doctor to tell us how he is," she finishes and has tears in her eyes. So do I.

"How bad was it? Do you think he survives? He has to survive!" I yell desperately. Couldn't the doctor come already?!

"It looked pretty bad. I honestly don't know just how bad it was."

This wouldn't have happened if I wouldn't have left him. Why did I have to walk away?!

"He has to survive. I couldn't stand the idea if he wouldn't. And we had this big fight."

"Where did you have the fight?" Sebastian asks. I frown in confusion. Why is that important?

"Just around the corner of the school entrance. Why?"

"That's where we found him. When we were just about to get into the car, we saw Raphael and others going quickly to their cars and rushing out of the parking lot. Do you think there might have been a chance that they heard you saying something that revealed your relationship?"

"Yes, I think that's very much possible. Shit! We should have been more careful. Now I blame myself even more!"

"It's not your fault there are jerks like Raphael and his gang in our school. Why were you fighting?" Clary asks.

"It was actually Raphael's fault that we were fighting. He was starting to suspect that something was going on since I hadn't had any girls for a while. So, he decided to introduce me to this very slutty girl. I didn't even show any interest in her and she just rudely came to sit on my lap. Jonathan got mad and left before I got a change to push her away."

Clary is looking very mad and her small hands are in tight fists.

"You have no idea how bad I want to punch him right now. Or maybe you do," she says.

"Believe me, I do. I don't think I've ever wanted to beat the shit out of someone this much."

"Maybe we can all beat him up," Sebastian says.

"Yes, or maybe we can report him and the others to the police. I think the school has security cameras. We can make them all go to jail or something. It probably depends on how Jonathan is," I say.

Why can't the doctor just hurry the hell up! I need to know he's okay. He has to be okay. I mean, I think I'd feel something if he'd… I can't even think about the word. I feel like it would bring bad luck.

Clary says that he's been there for like an hour now. And then we wait restlessly for another two hours.

"I think it's a good sing that they're taking so much time. If there was nothing they could do I think they would've already come and tell us. Right?" I ask hopefully.

"I think you're right," Clary says and gives a small smile.

We wait for a half an hour and then a doctor finally arrives and asks for the relatives of Jonathan. We all stand up and quickly walk to the doctor. I'm so nervous. It feels like hours until he starts talking and telling how Jonathan is. He tells us he has few fractured ribs. He tells a lot of other stuff they fixed, but I'm just concentrating if he's alive and if I can see him soon. I need to see him to believe that he's okay. Of course he's not okay. He's probably all full of pain medicine. But the important thing is that he's going to survive.

"When can we see him?" Clary asks.

"You can see him now, but he's still asleep. And only family can go in," the doctor says.

Before I can start to protest how I'm his boyfriend and deserve to see him, Clary beats me to it.

"I'm his sister and these are his brothers," she says. She's an excellent liar since the doctor believes her, even though we look nothing alike.

The doctor leads us to Jonathan's room. When we go in I stop dead in my tracks. His face is all swollen up and covered in bruises. He's hooked on the machines and he looks so weak. I feel tears falling down.

Clary and Sebastian go next to the bed and I go to the other side of it. I take his limp hand in mine.

"I'm so glad that he's fine," Clary says relieved and I nod in agreement.

We all stare at Jonathan's unconscious body, waiting for him to wake up. Only then I can believe that he's really going to survive.

It takes half an hour when Jonathan finally starts to open his eyes. When they're completely open, Clary jumps to hug him.

"You had us all so worried!" Clary says as she hugs Jonathan tightly.

"It hurts," Jonathan says in a weak voice.

Clary lets go of Jonathan and looks down at him apologetically. I want to hug him too, but I'm scared he's still mad at me. He turns to look at me. He doesn't look mad.

"Come here," he says and I quickly lean down to hug him gently. He weakly wraps his arms around me. We stay that way for a while and when we separate I give him a small kiss on the cheek.

When I lift my head, I see Clary and Sebastian looking at us with a smile.

"Could you leave us alone for a moment? I need to talk to Jace," Jonathan asks Clary and Sebastian. Clary looks hesitant to leave, but finally agrees and leaves with Sebastian.

I nervously turn to look at Jonathan, waiting for him to speak up.

"I'm sorry I overacted that way. It was not your fault Raphael decided to set you up with that slut. None of this would've happened if I could've just controlled my temper. If they wouldn't have heard our argument, they wouldn't have beaten me up. It won't probably take a long time until the whole school finds out about us," he rambles nervously and I stroke his hair gently. I frown down at him.

"It was not your fault. I shouldn't have left you there. I should have taken you home. And I couldn't care less who will find out about us, the worst has already happened. The only reason I didn't want anyone to know about us before was that I was afraid something like this would happen. And now that it happened to you, I promise we will make them pay."

"I know, but how can we make sure nothing like this happens again?"

"I guess we can never be absolutely sure, but we can't live a lie for the rest of our lives just because we're afraid. But if it would make you feel any safer, we could take some self-defense classes or something," I suggest and smile at him, trying to make things better. I feel like I'd do anything to be able to be with Jonathan.

"I wouldn't see any harm in it." He takes my hand and squeezes it.

"Was it Raphael and his friends who attacked you?" I'm pretty sure it was them, but I just need to know for sure.

"Yes. There was too many of them. There was no way I would've been able to fight them all. I was so scared." It breaks my heart to hear him speak like that. I lean down to hug him. We stay in our embrace until we hear someone coming into the room.

We separate and turn to look at the door. It's Jocelyn and Valentine Morgenstern, Jonathan's parents.


	11. Chapter 11

As I see my parents stepping into my hospital room, I know that this will be the moment of truth. I need to tell them about me and Jace and I'm so nervous. But that is of course after they've made sure I'm okay. Knowing my mom, it will take a while.

Mom and dad rush into the room to stand beside my bed.

"We were so worried about you! We came as soon as we heard what happened. Or they didn't exactly tell us everything that happened, just that you had broken ribs and you were most likely beaten up by someone. What happened?" my mom rambles nervously.

I explain how Raphael and the others beat me up. And then comes the question I had been dreading for.

"I will make them pay. Why did they do it? "dad asks angrily. He became furious as he heard what happened.

I turn to look at Jace who has been silent by my side since my parents came to the room. He smiles at me encouragingly and nods his head. I take a deep breath and turn back to look at my parents.

"I have something to tell you. I know this will come to you as a shock and I hope you'll try to understand. And try to keep calm, because I've been through enough today."

They look at me confused.

"Jace and I are dating," I blurt out.

They look shocked and thankfully I see no hint of anger. I know mom wouldn't react that badly, but I'm more afraid of dad's reaction. Their gazes go between me and Jace and they don't seem to be able to say anything, so I continue speaking.

"That's why they beat me up. They heard us arguing about our relationship. Then Jace left and they confronted me."

"Oh. Well, I'm happy for you two. This is a shock, but we will get used to it, right, Valentine?" mom asks dad who hasn't said anything yet.

"Yes. This is very unexpected, but I accept it. If he makes you happy then I'm happy for you," dad says, a little awkwardly and gives me a small smile. He then turns to look at Jace with a serious expression. "And I take it you have made things up with Jonathan?"

"Yes. Everything's good between us now," Jace says nervously. My dad can be a little scary sometimes.

"Good," dad says curtly. Mom starts rambling nervously again and I roll my eyes. I wish they'd just leave me alone with Jace.

"When can you leave?" mom asks.

"The doctor said that if everything goes as expected, I get to leave in two days."

"We have to leave for a business trip tomorrow. We wouldn't go if it wouldn't be absolutely important. I'm sure your sister or Jace can take you home and take care of you." Mom looks so guilty.

"It's fine. And yes, I'm sure either of them can take care of me, right, Jace?" I turn to look at Jace.

"Yes, absolutely. I'll take him home and make sure he has everything he needs," he reassures my parents and smiles at them.

After my parents are reassured that I'm okay, they go home. Clary comes right after they leave and I tell her to go home to sleep. I swear she's as bad as mom. After telling her that I'm fine, she finally leaves, leaving me and Jace alone.

I don't know if I should ask him to stay.

"Before you ask me to leave, I'm not going. I can't leave you here alone. I wouldn't be able to sleep. I'd just be worrying about you all the time." I can see that there's no arguing with him. I am glad he's staying. The idea of spending the night alone here makes me distressed.

"You better get comfortable then," I say and make some space for him next to me on the bed.

"Are you sure?" he asks hesitantly.

"Get in here," I command and he carefully settles down next to me. I lie on my back and Jace lies on his side, facing me. I turn to look at him, finding him already looking at me.

"You really scared me today," he says sadly, his eyes getting a little wet.

"I'm fine. Nothing too bad happened to me."

"But something worse could've happened." I cut off his worrying by kissing him. He responds immediately. He's kissing me very gently and I'm glad. I need his gentleness right now since I've had a really rough day. He softly strokes my hair. His kisses and touching are so soothing to me right now. After a while of kissing, we finally separate.

"We should go to sleep. You've had a long day," Jace says quietly and lightly wraps his other arm around me, careful not to hurt me.

"You're right. Good night," I say and kiss him.

"Good night."

* * *

><p>"Jonathan, wake up," I hear a familiar voice saying gently to me. It certainly is not Jace since he doesn't have a girl's voice. I open my eyes and turn to look at the direction where the voice came from. Clary is standing beside my bed.<p>

"What're you doing here?" I ask tiredly. It must be early, because I feel very tired.

"I just came to check up on you before I went to school." She moves the hair away from my eyes and strokes my head softly.

"What time is it?"

"It's seven. I'm sorry I came so early. I just didn't want to be late for school. And I thought that maybe Jace would need to go to school too. But maybe it's hard to make him leave your side." I have to agree with that. He did stay the night and refused to go home.

"You're right," I say and turn to look at Jace who's still sleeping. His arm is protectively wrapped around me. I shake him a little and his eyes open. He looks at me and then his gaze moves to Clary.

"Hey, what's up?" he asks.

"I came to see Jonathan before going to school and I thought that you'd need to go to school too." Jace's arm tightens around me slightly.

"No. I'm not leaving him here alone. Something could happen."

"You need to go to school. I'll be fine. The nurses are here if something happens. I'm sure nothing will happen. You can come back after school," I say.

"But-"

"No. You are going to school. You need to go. I'll be fine." He still looks hesitant. Then he sighs.

"Fine. You have your phone here?"

"Yes."

He kisses me twice and then gets up from the bed. He takes his jacket from the chair and puts it on. He rounds the bed and goes to stand next to Clary. Now they're both looking at me side by side, scared to leave me alone.

"How many times do I have to say it? Go to school." Jace still looks uneasy and I give him a hard look.

"Okay, but I'll come back right after school," he says and leans down to kiss me one more time.

We say our goodbyes and they leave. I hope everything will go okay in school.

* * *

><p>I drive Clary to school since she took a taxi to the hospital. When we get out of the car in the school parking lot, I notice Clary and Jonathan's father going inside the school.<p>

"What's your father doing here? Is he already coming to check out the security cameras?"

"Yes. He wastes no time. Plus, he and mom are going on a business trip today. He wants to make them pay."

We walk inside and I see Valentine standing in the hallway talking with our principal, Luke Garroway.

"Do you think we could see the security camera footage too? I wanna know for sure who it was that did it to him," I say to Clary and I notice my voice wavering with anger a bit.

"Well, let's go find out," she responds and starts dragging me to Valentine and Luke.

Turns out that I'm already needed since there's a police officer in the office and I was the last one to talk with Jonathan before the incident. He needs to know all the details of the day to know what really happened and why Jonathan was beaten up. They also need Clary since she was the one who found him.

As we go to the office, there's a paused image on the computer screen of what looks like the security camera's footage. The image is of me and Jonathan.

All of us gather around the screen to watch the video. The principal puts it on play. It doesn't have a sound, but it's clear that Jonathan and I are arguing. It's painful to watch. It's even more painful when I see myself walking away from him. If only I hadn't.

But the thing that hurts the most is when Raphael and the others gather around Jonathan and start beating him. I hear as Clary starts crying and I put an arm around her shoulder for comfort. I feel tears rolling down my cheeks too. They're both tears of sadness and anger.

Soon it only shows an image of Jonathan lying on the ground, passed out. Some time passes and then Clary and Sebastian run to him. They carry him away and the principal stops the video.

We spend about an hour of answering the questions the police officer asks. Like, who were the guys and what were me and Jonathan fighting about.

We get the rest of the day off since the principal thinks that this must be so hard for us. I'm so glad. Now I can go back to the hospital. And I really don't want to see the assholes that beat Jonathan up right now. I might not be able to control my temper.

Clary wants to go back to the hospital too so I take her with me as I go. As we go inside Jonathan's hospital room, he's looking at us with a disapproving look.

"Are you kidding me? Why aren't you at school?" I can't help but smirk at him.

"Aw, I missed you too," I say and walk over to him. I gently hug him, afraid of hurting him. We separate and he still looks at me disapprovingly.

"Seriously, what are you doing here? Are you ditching?"

"Relax. The principal let us go earlier since he thought that we might be upset about what happened to you. We saw the security camera footage." I say the last part quietly, looking at him warily.

Clary doesn't give Jonathan time to answer as she runs to hug him.

"It was so awful to watch them do that to you," she cries against his shoulder. Jonathan carefully wraps his arms around her and comforts her.

The three of us spend the day in Jonathan's hospital room. Both Clary and I refuse to leave Jonathan alone. The nurse comes to check him sometimes. Everything is going as planned and he should be able to go home tomorrow.

Hopefully when he returns to school, those idiots that beat him up are expelled. I know they are. The police and the principle saw the tape so they can't let them just get away with it. I can't believe they were so stupid that they thought that they were never gonna get caught. But they are idiots who beat someone up because he was dating another guy, so maybe I do believe that they're actually so dumb.

* * *

><p>Weeks fly by as I take care of Jonathan. He doesn't have any bruises anymore, but his ribs are not completely healed yet. He tries to tell me and Clary to not fuss so much, but of course we're not listening. We both care about him so much. Almost every day when his parents come home from work, they check on him to make sure everything is okay.<p>

Sometimes Clary brings Sebastian to the house too and then we all fuss around Jonathan to annoy him. Thankfully Clary and Sebastian are serious with each other so I don't have to be jealous of him being near Jonathan. Though sometimes it is kind of weird thinking how he has dated both of the siblings.

Also all of our friends have come to see him. They all had this pitying look on their faces when they saw Jonathan in that shape. It really annoys him. They weren't even that surprised when they learned that Jonathan and I are now together. They were of course very happy for us.

Today is the day when Jonathan goes back to school. I've always made sure to give him the homework and things we've been working in class during these weeks. He does have a few tests waiting for him this week, but I think he'll be fine.

Especially since those idiots are no longer there. They were expelled and got the punishment they deserved. Hopefully now everyone knows not to mess with us.

I guide Jonathan to the car, holding him gently by his sides. I know it annoys him, but he has tried to shake me off way too many times and knows by now that I'm not leaving his side.

I get Jonathan to the car and then go in myself. I'm pretty nervous as I start to drive towards the school. I mean, everyone has heard about me and Jonathan, but this is the first time they'll see us together. Girls have still tried to get my attention, but I've told them that I'm dating Jonathan. They always react differently. Some are sad that I'm no longer available for them and some are angry and disgusted. But I couldn't give a fuck of what they think.

"Are you nervous?" I ask. I quickly glance at Jonathan and see him staring blankly at the road.

"Not really. I'm more concerned of how people will react on seeing me again at school. I really don't care, but it annoys me when someone looks at me with pity. I swear to god if I see a one more look of pity…." he trails of angrily. We stop in the parking lot of school and I turn to look at him.

"You mean this look?" I put a pitying look on my face.

"Yes! I hate that look! Except it's not so bad when you do it," he says smiling and I lean in to kiss him. I didn't even have to scan the parking lot to make sure no one sees us. Our kiss gets a little too heated up and we separate, leaning our foreheads together. We're both breathing heavily. Fuck, I just really want to rip of our clothes and take him, or him to take me. We haven't been able to do much because of his injuries. Maybe some blowjobs and hand jobs, but I think we're both ready to take it further.

"Can we just stay here and make out?" Jonathan asks grinning, but I can see a little nervousness underneath it.

"I'd love that, but we can't. And even if we would stay here and make out, we would probably end up doing a lot more than that."

"I wouldn't mind." I roll my eyes. I give him one last kiss and get out of the car. I round the car and go open the door wider that Jonathan has already opened. Now it's his turn to roll his eyes. I just grin at him and reach down to help him get out of the car.

As we start walking towards the school, everyone is looking at us. It doesn't surprise me, but it's more annoying than I thought it would be.

"Don't you just feel like yelling at them to mind their own business?" Jonathan asks pissed off.

"I was just thinking about the same thing," I mutter. We start walking faster to the school, eager to get this day over with.

* * *

><p><strong>There might be like two chapters left anymore. I might write more than that if I come up with more ideas<strong>


	12. Chapter 12

The school day goes by pretty well. Jonathan takes a few tests. When we walk down the hall, many people are looking at Jonathan with pity. It infuriates him. Sometimes I hear girls whisper things like: "It's such a shame that they're gays now. It's such a waste." That infuriates the both of us. We haven't suddenly just turned gay. Neither of us is completely gay. We both have dated girls and enjoyed it, but now we just found out that we like being with each other more than anyone else.

Every teacher is telling Jonathan how sorry they are of what happened to him. And they also give him the look.

By the end of the day as we walk out of the school, Jonathan is pissed off. He's storming towards my car and I hurry behind him. I unlock the car doors and we go inside. Jonathan lets out a deep sigh.

"Finally. Peace," is all he can say. I chuckle.

"How do you know that tomorrow is going to be any easier?" He turns to glare at me slightly.

"It has to be. They saw that I'm fine. Okay, maybe I need to walk more carefully, not to put so much pressure on my ribs. They still don't need to give me that look. If they still do that tomorrow, then I'm honestly gonna have to say something about it." During his ramble I've already started the car and am driving towards his house.

"I can only imagine how annoying it is. And did you hear those things the girls said about us?"

"That was so annoying too. It's not like we're the only fucking guys in the world!" he exclaims.

"We're not, but we are the best looking." I grin at him and he grins back.

"Yes we are. No one can compare to us. I bet a lot of them would even pay to see us do some stuff together."

"Of course they would. Imagine how hot we look when we're making out or doing things to each other, naked in your bed." I'm getting really hot as I talk about this stuff. I need to have him right now. I can see that he's also getting pretty turned on as the front of his pants bulges more.

"Maybe we could tape it and see just how sexy we look together," he says seductively and I drive a bit faster.

As we arrive to his house we go straight up to his room. He closes the door and I gently turn him around to face me. His eyes are filled with so much hunger and I know that mine are too. I grab him by the back of his head and bring his lips to mine. He groans against my lips as I press my body tightly against his. I feel his hard on rubbing against mine as we continue kissing passionately.

I guide him to his bed and lie down next to him. I really wish I could lie on top of him, but his ribs need to heal and I don't think putting my body weight on top of his is helping.

We stare at each other with hooded eyes. I move the hair out of his eyes and keep my hand there gently pressed against the side of his face.

"I want to fuck you so badly right now," Jonathan says.

"I don't think we can. I don't want to hurt you. I mean how could we? If I would be on top I would have to put pressure on you and if you would be on top…" I trail off as I can't really come up with anything. I mean, of course he would put a little pressure on his ribs as he would be moving, but I think it'd be just fine. It gets me so fucking turned on to think of him moving on top of me. Sure, it kind of scares me how his big dick is going to fit inside me.

"Problem solved. I'll be on top," Jonathan says in a low sexy voice. He spreads my legs and settles down on top of me. I wish I could just snap my fingers and our clothes would magically disappear.

Jonathan starts to grind against me. I rip his shirt off and he immediately does the same to me. He lowers his naked torso against mine. His warm, muscled body feels so damn good. He starts kissing me urgently and my hands move to the button of his jeans. I open them and push them down along with his boxers. I'm getting extremely impatient. I need to have him now!

Soon we're both completely naked, Jonathan still lying on top of me. Both of us are gasping for breath because of the passionate kissing and sexual need. I can feel his hard cock pressed against me and it's not enough. I want it inside me.

"Are you ready?" he asks breathily.

"I'm so fucking ready," I say desperately and he grins at me. He reaches out for his nightstand and takes the lube. We're definitely gonna need a lot of that, since he's so big.

He kneels between my legs and strokes me a bit. As I would need that. I'm pretty much ready to burst right now. Thankfully he soon takes the lube and puts some of it to his fingers. First he pushes in one finger and it feels a bit uncomfortable, but soon it starts feel good. One by one he puts more fingers inside me and then he has three inside me. I'm panting and enjoying the things he's doing to me.

"Does it feel good?" Jonathan asks as he continues to slowly pump his fingers inside me.

"Yes," I groan.

He comes up and kisses me his fingers still pleasuring me.

"Are you ready for me?" he mumbles against my lips.

"As ready as I'll ever be," I answer, knowing that no amount of fingers is going to completely prepare me for him. Or sure, if it would be like his whole hand, but I don't want that.

He takes his fingers out of me and then I feel the head of his dick pushing in slightly. We remain eye contact as he little by little slides inside. He stays still and kisses me, giving me time to get used to him. First it hurts like hell, but little by little I get used to the feeling of him inside me.

Jonathan starts to move in and out and we both groan.

"Fuck. You feel so good, Jace," he moans.

"So do you." I move my hands up and down his back and start meeting his thrusts. He stars moving harder and faster. Both of us are groaning and panting loudly.

I look down to see his big, hard dick moving in and out of me and it is so fucking hot. The sight of this very hot guy fucking me is getting me extremely close. Of course also the fact that I have deep feelings for him is making it more pleasurable.

Jonathan moves impossibly fast now, both of us groaning repeatedly.

"I'm gonna cum," he breaths out.

"Cum inside me," I groan and immediately his movements stop and his back arches as he comes inside me. He groans my name against my neck.

Feeling him coming inside me triggers me and I cum all over my abs and chest, breathing out his name.

Jonathan slumps down on top of me, still inside me. We're both gasping for breath as we come down from our high.

After a moment he lifts his head from my neck. He presses his lips against mine. His lips and tongue move against mine slowly and lovingly.

After a while we separate and he looks at me gently.

"I love you so fucking much. Of course I loved you before too as a friend, but now I love as more," he says.

"I love you too," I respond. I've wanted to say that for a while, but I guess I've been scared. And I now realize how stupid I was.

We contently lie in each other's arms sometimes kissing and sometimes just looking at each other.

* * *

><p>Later me and Jace walk downstairs, still in bliss of having sex for the first time with each other. As we walk in the living room, I wished we had stayed upstairs.<p>

Clary and Sebastian are passionately making out on the couch, Sebastian on top of her. They're grinding against each other's and moaning.

I clear my throat loudly and they jump apart. Their expressions are startled.

"I didn't notice you guys there," Clary says embarrassed.

"Well, you could've at least gone to your room to do that," I point out. I really wished they would've. I did not need to see that. Or hear that.

"If you would've kept the noise down, we could've stayed in my room. Seriously, I think our neighbors heard it too," Clary says. I didn't even hear the front door as I was so concentrated on Jace.

"Sorry. I guess I didn't really hear you coming in," I say, smirking at her.

"You asshole! " she exclaims.

"You can go upstairs now. It's all yours," Jace teases.

"Hey!" I protest. I know Sebastian and Clary have already had sex, but I'm still her protective big brother and I don't want to encourage her to go to bed with her boyfriend.

But it's too late, seeing as they're already running upstairs, grinning. Great.

"Sorry,"Jace says, but it doesn't sound like he's sorry at all.

"Yeah, I'm sure you're really sorry. How about we go buy that clown doll to you now?" A dark grin spreads to my face and Jace looks panicked.

"No. Sorry, I just thought that… Because they have already had sex…" he's stumbling with his words.

"Relax, I'm not going to buy the doll. That is, if you behave." I grin at him.

"But if I wouldn't behave, I'm sure you could think of a different punishment," he says lowly.

"Really? What kind of punishment?" I ask, pulling his body against mine. Instead of answering me, he slips out of my arms and goes to sit down on the couch. I go sit down next to him, but he just ignores me. He opens the TV.

"Oh great! It's the new season of 'American Horror Story: Freak Show'," Jace says and watches it excited. I turn to look at the TV and grin. It's the second episode. I already watched the first episode, and there was this really creepy clown. It was even creepier than the one in 'It'. This should be fun.

Jace glances at me and notices how I'm grinning.

"Why are you grinning like that?" he asks suspiciously.

"I'm just really excited for this," I answer. He nods and faces the TV again.

Soon the moment I've expected comes.

"Holy fuck!" he yells and turns his head away fast. I laugh. "You knew about this, didn't you? That's why you were grinning like that!"

"It's just so funny!" I say, still laughing. Of course it's not funny when he's really scared, but when he's just a bit freaked out, it's hilarious.

"No, it's not! How the fuck am I gonna be able to sleep with that creepy clown in my head? I mean, it was even creepier than the one in 'It'." He shudders. I run my hand through his hair.

"I think I know what we can do when you're not gonna be able to sleep," I say seductively.

"Oh really?" He smirks.

"Really," I say and connect my mouth with his, all clowns forgotten.

* * *

><p>A week later me and Jace are lying on a couch in my living room, kissing and enjoying the feel of each other's bodies. Everything has been great. After a couple of days everyone at school realized that I really am okay, thankfully they don't give me that annoying look anymore. Plus, the students also got tired of talking about me and Jace. Everything is in perfect balance and I feel like nothing can break this.<p>

"Awww! Aren't you guys cute!" comes the voice of my sister, who has the worst timing always. Me and Jace sit up.

"What do you want?" I ask slightly pissed off. Her expression turns into nervous and my face softens.

"I have something to tell you," she says nervously.

"What is it?" I ask concerned.

"I- I'm pregnant." I sit there, thinking if I just heard her correctly. And then I bolt up from the couch fast.

"What?!" No, this cannot be happening.

"I just don't know what to do. And Sebastian…" she trails off, looking down.

"What did that bastard do? I'm gonna kick his ass," I say and start to walk towards the front door, but Clary catches me.

"No! Please stay. I don't want to be alone right now," she pleads with her big green eyes. I pull her in for a hug.

"I'm gonna kill that bastard. He left you, didn't he?" I ask angrily. Her body starts to shake. First I think it's because she's sobbing, but then I hear those familiar giggles. What the fuck? I pull away from the hug and yes, she is laughing. Then I get it. "That was all a prank wasn't it?" I ask astounded.

"Yes!" she manages between her laughing. "You should have seen your face!" She's doubling over with laughter. I'm still standing in shock.

"That was so unfair! How could you do something like that?" Clary's laughter dies off and she's wiping her eyes because of laughing so hard.

"I just got this idea and it refused to leave my head. What was I supposed to do?" she asks innocently.

"Fight the temptation? That was just so… You know, this is not going to stay here. I still haven't even revenged that porn you put into my DVD player." I never really remembered to do that. I had so much other drama in my life, but now…

An evil grin spreads to my face and Clary's smile disappears. That's right, you should be scared.

Jace is still sitting on the couch, looking at us warily. He's probably having second thoughts about being with me. The expression on his face is so hilarious that I can't help but laugh. Clary turns to look at what I'm laughing at and after seeing Jace starts to laugh too.

My laughter dies quickly and I remember how I shouldn't be in good terms with my sister right now. I turn to look at her and her laughter dies immediately.

"This time I will get my revenge," I say and enjoy the frightened look on her face.

I go sit down next to Jace and Clary runs to her room.

"What the fuck was that?" Jace asks and I chuckle.

"_That_, was a beginning of a prank war," I say and Jace groans.

"Does that mean that I have to be a part of that? After all, we do hang out together almost all the time."

"Don't worry, I'll protect you." I kiss him.

"I don't need protection," he says defiantly.

"Of course you don't." Jace looks offended.

"Hey-!" I cut him off with my mouth and push him to lie down on the couch.

* * *

><p><strong>I came up with some more ideas, but there still isn't that many chapters left.<strong>


	13. Chapter 13

As Jace and I are lying down on his bed, enjoying each other's company, I come up with a question.

"Have you told your parents about us yet?" I know that his parents are just as busy with work as mine, but he could have told them at some point. But seeing the uneasy look on Jace's face, I don't think he has.

"No, I haven't had any time." I can tell that it's just an excuse. I can read him so well and I don't even know why he bothers trying to lie to me.

"Really? Why am I not believing that?" Jace unwraps his arms from around me and puts his hands to cover his face. I didn't know it was such a big deal for him. Of course it's hard, but I think his parents would accept it. They are nice people.

Jace moves his hands from his face and turns to look at me.

"I'm just worried of their reaction. Or maybe more of dad's reaction. He has always spoken very disapprovingly about gays." I never knew his dad, Stephen, could be like that. He has seemed so nice always when I've seen him. And I've seen him quite many times during our six years long friendship.

I inch my body closer to Jace and rest my hand on his shoulder.

"I'm sorry. I didn't know that. But maybe he could accept you. You after all are his son," I try to reassure him.

"I don't think so. If you would've heard the things he has said. But I guess I'm gonna have to tell them someday. Maybe my mom can convince him to accept us." I hate seeing him so upset and worried. So I move my body closer to him. I wrap my arms around him for comfort.

"I can be there with you if it makes you feel any better," I suggest. I could be there for support. But also, things could get very ugly and I don't know what I'd do then. But I would prefer to be there rather than leave Jace handle it all by himself.

"I guess it would be a bit easier. I'm just afraid what my dad will say."

"If you're worrying that he'd say something to make me walk away, it's impossible. Nothing anyone says can keep me away from you, because I love you and you've always been very important to me," I say, looking into his nervous eyes. Jace smiles and gives me a kiss.

"Thank you. And I love you too. Maybe we should get it over with tonight. My parents should be home earlier today." I'm getting very nervous too as he says that we can tell them tonight.

"I'm sure it'll go fine. Even my dad took it well and he can be really scary sometimes." Jace breaks into a smile.

"You're right. But I am still freaked out. I guess, it's just better to get this over with." The smile is wiped from his face as he obviously starts to think about those awful scenarios of how it could go. I guess I need to do something to distract him.

"You know what we could do before your parents get home?" I ask, breaking Jace from his thoughts.

"What?" I don't answer, but roll us around so that I'm on top of him. I immediately press my lips on his and he seems to melt into the kiss. Jace wraps his arms tightly around me as we kiss unhurriedly. We stay like that for a long time, just kissing. It feels so relaxing, but at the same time my heart is beating very hard in my chest.

As we hear the front door open and close, we spring apart fast. Jace is looking very frightened. I put my arm around him.

"It's gonna be alright," I say, but I don't know if I believe it. Jace pulls me to him and hugs me tightly. I hug him back and wish that we could just stay here hugging. I'm getting more and more worried of how bad his dad really is.

After a moment we separate. Jace sighs and we get up from the bed.

"Let's get this over with," he says and we get out of his room. I push my fear away as much as I possibly can. I need to support Jace and be there for him.

We go to the kitchen where his parents are, making something to eat after a long workday. They greet us and Jace wastes no time as he asks them to sit down at the dining table. They look confused, but do it anyways. Jace and I sit across from them.

Jace's dad looks very much the same as Jace, with the same blond wavy hair and same kind of face. He does have some of his mom, Celine, in him too. Like the same colored golden eyes.

They're both waiting for us to speak. As I turn to look at Jace, he looks so nervous. I just want to take his hand and let him know that I'm here with him. But I can't do that right now.

"We have something to tell you," Jace starts nervously. Both of his parents look worried.

"What is it?" Celine asks concerned. Jace takes in a deep breath and exhales.

"Jonathan and I are dating," he says cautiously. Celine looks shocked and I have no idea what she's thinking of the situation. I turn my head to look at Stephen. He looks infuriated.

"What?" Stephen growls.

"Calm down," Celine says and puts her hand on his shoulder, trying to calm him down.

"No! My son is not dating another guy!" I 'd really want to defend Jace, but I just don't want to get too much involved. I don't even really know what I could say!

Jace is looking hopeless and it makes me feel so awful.

"Tell me this is some sick joke," he demands Jace.

"It's not. We're in love and we really are together," Jace says.

"No, this is not happening," Stephen says and gets up. He walks out of the kitchen.

"I'm sorry you had to see that," Celine apologizes me. She then turns to Jace. "I'll talk to your father. You know the way he thinks about gays."

"Does that mean that you approve this?" Jace asks hesitantly.

"Of course I do. And I'll make your father approves this too," she says and smiles warmly. I really hope she could talk some sense into her husband.

"I don't know if that's possible," Jace mumbles.

"Well, he's gonna have to. If you really want to be with Jonathan, then we have no say in it," she says, smiling gently.

"Thank you. I just hope dad will accept this."

"I'll go talk to him right now. Don't worry about it too much." She gives a one last smile to Jace and leaves the kitchen.

I finally take Jace's hand and squeeze it reassuringly. He turns to look at me and he looks so sad. I pull him in for a hug and he tightly wraps his arms around me.

"I don't know what I'll do if my dad won't accept us." Jace's voice sounds so broken. I hug him tighter to me.

"He has to. You've always been close. This can't change everything." Jace separates from the hug.

"Yes, it can! You saw how he reacted." I sigh. I really don't know what else to say. I can't predict the future. And I know that when he feels so hopeless, no words can make him believe that his father is actually going to accept us.

"I think I should take you home. I need to be alone right now." I'd really want to be there for him, but if he feels like he needs to be alone, then there's nothing I can do.

We're both quiet as Jace drives me to my house. As he parks the car in front of my house, I turn to face him. I turn his face towards mine and give him two small kisses.

"I'll come pick you up tomorrow morning," Jace says, his voice somber.

"Yeah. Bye," I say and get out of the car. I watch hopelessly as Jace drives off. I really wish I could do something to make him feel better.

* * *

><p>It's morning and I'm waiting for Jace to come pick me up. I'm standing in front of my house. He's already ten minutes late. We're gonna be late if he doesn't come soon. I try calling him, but he doesn't answer. I hope nothing has happened to him. I hope this doesn't have something to do with his dad.<p>

Clary comes to stand next to me, probably waiting for Sebastian to come pick her up.

"Hasn't Jace come pick you up yet?" she asks confused.

"No. He's supposed to be here already." I'm starting to get really nervous and impatient.

"That's weird. Has something happened?"

"We told his parents about us yesterday and his dad got mad."

"Oh. I hope everything is okay," she says concerned.

"Me too."

"Well, since he's not coming to pick you up, you can catch a ride with me and Sebastian." And that is what I do. A moment later Sebastian drives in front of us and we go inside his car.

I really hope Jace is at school and that he's okay. But he has some explaining to do.

When I walk inside the school, I see Jace at his locker. I quickly walk to him, desperate for some answers.

"Why didn't you come pick me up?" I ask as I reach him. Jace turns to look at me startled.

"I can't talk about it right now," is all he says.

"Did something happen with your dad?" I can't just wait until later to find out what's going on.

"I said I can't talk about it right now. We'll talk after school." I can see how he's losing his temper. I put my hand on his shoulder, but his moves away.

"I need to know now." Jace sighs and runs a hand through his hair. He drags me behind the corner where we won't have so much audience. This is starting to really scare me.

"We can't be together anymore."

"What?" No, there's no way I heard him correctly.

"My dad said that if I don't break up with you, he's not gonna pay for my college. There's no way I could afford it on my own." I feel my legs give up and I slide down against the wall.

"Didn't your mom talk to him?"

"She did, but apparently it didn't work." Jace is staring down at the floor.

"There must be something you can do. I mean, you can't just break up with me!" I plead desperately.

"But there isn't. He said that he would find out if we'd still keep seeing each other in secret." It hurts so much. I can't believe that he's actually breaking up with me. I know that he might feel like he has no other option, but how am I gonna be able to live without him? He's been in my life for years. I feel like I absolutely can't live without him.

I feel the tears start falling uncontrollably and I can't stop it.

"You can't just leave me. We're not just dating. You're my best friend." My broken voice makes Jace look down at me. He crouches down next to me.

"Please, don't cry. It's already hard for me," he pleads. He wraps his arms around him and I cling onto him like I never want to let go.

"I know, but there must be something. This can't just end like this. Or do you think that we won't be together during college and after it ends we can finally be together? 'Cause I couldn't handle that." My tears are starting to dry, because I feel calmer in Jace's arms. But I'm still extremely afraid that we can't work this out.

"I can't handle this either. I just don't know what to do." We separate and sit side by side on the floor.

"Try if you can convince your dad or if your mom could talk with him again. This just can't end like this."

"I know. I'm gonna do my best. But I don't think we can be together until things get better." The thought of being away from Jace hurts me so much.

I only nod since I can't seem to able to form any words. Just when things were good between us, this has to happen and ruin everything.

Suddenly Jace pulls me into a desperate kiss where we both cling onto each other, our lips moving fast. I never want this kiss to end, because when it does, I don't know when I'll be able to do it the next time.

But we need to separate eventually. Both of us have tears streaming down our cheeks.

"I'm gonna find a solution to this. I can't be without you," Jace says and stands up. I helplessly watch as he walks away.


	14. Chapter 14

I feel absolutely miserable as I'm walking home. I couldn't stay at school after Jace ended things between us. I mean, it's not his fault. He didn't want to break up with me. But I still feel so fucking awful. We've been so close for years and now suddenly we can't see each other at all. Isn't Stephen thinking at all how this is affecting Jace? Does he want his son to be unhappy?

When will I be able to be with Jace again? When can I hug and kiss him? I feel like I can't even survive for a day without him.

Even though the walk to my house is not exactly short, I don't mind. I don't really feel anything else than heartbroken. I just lost my best friend and boyfriend! Okay, maybe I didn't lose him for good, but I'm afraid he can't make his dad accept us and then we couldn't be together during college. What if Jace would find someone else? Not to mention that how the hell would I be able to be without Jace for that long.

I'm so tired of thinking of all these awful things that could happen. I walk home and as I go inside the house, I run to the couch and collapse on it. I fall asleep from exhaustion.

* * *

><p>"Jonathan," I hear someone say as I'm waking up. That someone is also shaking me by my shoulder. I open my eyes and sit up on the couch. I see Clary looking at me worriedly. "Has something happened? Why weren't you at school?" She sits down next to me.<p>

"Jace broke up with me." She looks at me shocked.

"What? Why?" I really wish she wouldn't have woken me up. I don't want to talk about this. I explain the situation to her anyway. I tell her how Jace didn't actually want to break up, but his dad made him. Clary is still looking at me shocked.

"He can't do that! It's so unfair! Isn't there anything to be done? I'm sure this can't be the end of your friendship and relationship." She looks at me sympathetically and rests her hand on my shoulder.

"I know, but I just feel so hopeless right now."

"It's gonna work out. It has to. I know how important Jace is to you and it just can't end like this." It's not helping me at all when she's talking like that. I don't feel like I have any tears left anymore, but I still feel so damn awful.

"I don't wanna talk about it right now, okay? I feel like it's making me feel worse." Clary nods and I get up and run upstairs to my room. I know that I have to go to school even when I feel like shit, but it's gonna be so hard to see Jace and not be able to even talk to him. But why couldn't we even talk? It's not like his dad has eyes everywhere.

I don't want to think about anything right now. I don't know how to take my mind off these things. I feel so hopeless.

* * *

><p>It's evening and I'm lying down on the living room couch. I've been lying here since I came home after school. I noticed how Jonathan had left earlier, since he wasn't in classes. I don't blame him. He must feel as awful as I.<p>

I'm so mad at my dad right now. I hope he realizes what he's doing to me. I haven't even been able to eat much today.

I keep lying on the couch and soon I hear the front door open.

"Hi, Jace," my mom greets me cheerfully, the exact opposite of how I'm feeling right now. I turn my head to look at her and the smile falls from her face. She must have noticed my mood. "Is everything okay?" How can she even ask that? Doesn't she know how much Jonathan means to me?

"No. Nothing is okay right now." Then dad joins her.

"You'll get over it," he says sternly. I scowl at him.

"You're ruining my life." I probably sound very immature right now, but he really is ruining my life. I don't believe that I'll ever love anyone like I love Jonathan.

"You'll thank me later." I look at him dumbfounded. Did he really just say that? I get up and walk over to him.

"No, I will not thank you for taking away someone I love. You just can't realize how much he means to me. You can't understand how I can love another guy, but the love I feel for him is very real. I'll never be thankful to you for doing this." I stomp off upstairs to my room.

Now I lie on my bed. I can't spend my days like this, no matter how awful I feel. But I just don't feel like doing anything.

The door opens and my mom walks in. She sits down at the edge of my bed, frowning at me concerned.

"Even though I couldn't make your father see that you are now dating Jonathan, he still can't say that you can't go to college if you keep seeing him. He can't make all the decisions here." I start feeling very hopeful as she says that.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean that you are allowed to be with Jonathan and still go to college. Your father can't control your life like this. He'll get used to the idea. He's just very shocked." I could almost start crying of how relieved I feel right now. Almost is not the right word as I feel the tears start falling. I guess I've been very emotional today. "I thought you'd be happy." My mom frowns at me.

"I am." I smile and sit up. I hug her, because I'm so happy that at least she accepts me and Jonathan. I feel all the tension leaving my body. I know Jonathan will be very happy too. "Thank you so much." I separate from the hug and see her smiling at me.

"I just want you to be happy. You looked so miserable when I came home."

"I was very miserable. I bet Jonathan is too."

"You better let him know that it's all fixed now," she says and gets up from the bed.

"I think I'm gonna surprise him tomorrow." I'm unable to keep the grin from my face as I think how surprised and happy he'll be.

My mom leaves the room and I lie down contently on my bed, thinking of how Jonathan will react tomorrow. I soon feel the sleep taking over, because this has been such an awful day.

* * *

><p>I stand in front of my house with Clary, waiting for Sebastian to come pick us up. I barely slept last night and I'm dreading of seeing Jace. I see Clary looking at me concerned, she's been doing that a lot. She rubs my back comfortingly. She knows that I don't want to talk about it.<p>

I see a car arriving in front of us, but it's not Sebastian's car, it's Jace's. What is he doing in here? I just stand there even though I see Jace motioning for me to go inside the car.

"Maybe you should go inside. It could be important," Clary says and gently pushes me towards the car. I hesitantly go inside. Jace has a bright smile on his face.

"I have some great news," he says cheerfully.

"What is it?" I'm feeling very confused about all this.

"We can be together after all. My mom said that dad can't just decide not to pay for my college if I date you." I can't believe he's telling me this. I immediately feel the tension getting out of me. "That is, if you still want to be with me," Jace says, confused about my silence.

"Of course I want to be with you," I say. I cup his face and bring his lips to mine. I feel so incredible as I feel his lips on mine again. I didn't expect it to get solved so early and I'm so relieved that it did. I honestly don't know how I would've survived weeks or even months without Jace.

We break the kiss and hug each other tightly.

"I missed you," Jace says.

"It was only a one day," I point out, but I know what he means. Yesterday was so miserable and I thought I was gonna have to be apart from him longer, so it felt like such a long day.

"Are you saying that you didn't miss me?" Jace asks as we separate from the hug.

"Of course I missed you. I'm so happy that we didn't have to be apart very long."

"Me too. We should go to school," he says and starts driving.

"Are you sure? Couldn't we go somewhere and spend some time together?"

"No. You already skipped school yesterday. I wish I would've too. I felt so awful and it wouldn't have mattered if I was there or not since I couldn't concentrate on anything."

"We really can't live without each other, can't we?" I see a smile spreading to Jace's face.

"No, we can't."


	15. Chapter 15

It's the first day of college and both Jace and I are very nervous. I have no idea what people will think of us when they find out that we're together. There probably will be some assholes who can't accept us, but I just hope they aren't as bad as Raphael. I'm also worried about the girls. How many days will it take for them to realize that we're together and not interested in them?

Me and Jace now live in an apartment near the college. It would've been like four hour drive if we would've decided to live home. And it's so much better this way. Now we can be together all the time.

We both got jobs at one coffee shop. We have been working there during summer and will now work after classes.

Sebastian also studies in the same college and got an apartment next to us. Clary still has one year left of high school and she's thinking of coming to study here too when she graduates.

"Calm down. I'm sure it won't be that bad," Jace say as we're walking towards the college, clearly noticing how nervous I am.

"How can you be sure? Are you a fortuneteller or something?" I snap at him. Jace stop and places his hands on my shoulders.

"No, but I don't think you need to stress in advance." He leans in and kisses me. I feel all the stress melting away. I don't even care if anyone sees. Jace's kisses just feel so good. But it's too bad that he has to pull away. "See? Nothing bad happened," he says and I notice that we're actually standing near the college entrance.

"I guess you're right. I'm just a bit stressed out. I mean, how long do you think it will take until all the girls will get the message that we're together?"

"It could take months," Jace jokes and it's not making me feel any better.

"Thank you. I feel so much better now," I say sarcastically.

"You know I was just joking. Stop stressing out. And please, let's not start fighting on the first day." He pleads me with his golden eyes and I just melt again.

"Fine. Let's go." I give Jace a quick kiss and we walk inside.

* * *

><p>"I'm sorry, but I have a boyfriend," I say once again to another girl who tries to flirt with me. I wonder how many times I've said that already. I have one class left anymore and I've never felt so relieved.<p>

"Are you just saying that because you don't like me?" the girl asks with her annoying nasal voice. I take a deep breath. I'm getting so fucking frustrated.

"No, I'm not. I really have a boyfriend," I say patiently. Although I do not feel patient at all right now.

"Where is he then?" Does she have to be so nosy?

"There you are, honey," I hear Jace's voice behind me suddenly. Honey? Did he just call me honey?

I turn to look at him and he's grinning to me. He presses a kiss on my lips.

"Are you kidding me?" I hear the girl say. I think she's the most annoying girl that has tried to flirt with me today. Most of them left after I politely told them that I have a boyfriend. This one is just so damn annoying!

"No. As you can see, I'm not kidding. And don't even dare to try to hit on my boyfriend," I say to her and start dragging Jace away. Why can't this damn day be over already?

"So, I guess this day has been as stressful as you thought," Jace says as we go to our next class.

"Yes." I sigh and we walk inside the classroom. We haven't had all the same classes, only few.

"Don't worry, I'll protect you for the rest of the day," Jace reassures me. I turn to glare at him as we sit down next to each other.

"I don't need your protection."

"But I think you just did," he points out, referring to that annoying girl. Thankfully the class starts, so we won't start arguing.

After the day finally ends, we walk back to our apartment. Neither of us talk much as we're both pretty tired. We go inside and I walk to the couch, slumping down on it.

"Don't you think it would be more comfortable in the bedroom?" Jace asks a I continue lying on the couch.

"I'm too tired to move. Can you carry me?" I ask, grinning up at him.

"Nope." Jace walks over to me and lies down on top of me.

"You're so heavy." I mean, I love having his body against mine, but not when he's putting his whole body weight on me.

"You leave no other choice, since you didn't go to the bedroom. I didn't want to go take a nap in our bed alone."

"Then at least move so you're not putting your weight on me completely." Jace moves so he's leaning more against the back of the couch.

"Better?" he asks.

"Yes. Are you gonna let me sleep now?" I ask and close my eyes. I feel Jace pressing a kiss on my neck leaning his head on my shoulder. I fall asleep in no time when Jace's arms are holding me tightly.

* * *

><p>I wake up later when I feel my phone buzzing in my pocket. I groan annoyed. I don't want to open my eyes and I'm too tired to talk to anyone. Plus, Jace is lying on that side, so he's on the way.<p>

"You should get that," Jace says with a sleepy voice right beside my ear.

"You're kind of on my way." Jace moves slightly and I pull the phone from my pocket. The damn phone is still ringing! Jace settles back down and I answer the phone.

"Hello?" My voice sounds like I've just woken up and my talking is lazy.

"Hello, brother! How was your first day?" comes Clary's cheery voice from the phone.

"Tiring and annoying. You just woke me up from my nap," I whine.

"I'm sure you'll survive. Why was it annoying?"

"There were a lot of girls who tried to flirt with me. There are you happy? Can I go back to sleep? Shouldn't you be calling to your boyfriend?"

"I just did. I can't wait to come study there too!" A smirk spreads to my face and Jace's eyes narrow as he's watching me.

"I can't wait either. I still haven't revenged those pranks you did. But when you'll move next door with Sebastian..." I trail off and I can almost see her nervous face. Jace is looking at me disapprovingly. He didn't like the idea of me doing those pranks at all. He doesn't want to get in the middle of it.

"I don't believe that you're creative enough to come up with good pranks," she says, but I can hear the fear in her voice. Oh, I think I am. I already have some great ideas. Too bad I have to wait for a year.

"Really?"

"Yes. So, don't bother even trying. You're probably not gonna even remember it!"

"Keep telling yourself that." Suddenly I feel something rubbing against the front of my jeans. I look down and see Jace's hand there. I look at Jace incredulously and he just smirks at me. I'm on the phone with my sister!

"Well, if you do try to prank me, then I'll do it too," Clary says. I try to move Jace's hand away, but he just keep rubbing me and I feel myself getting harder.

"I have to go," I say in a strained voice.

"Are you scared?" I just barely hear Clary's last sentence as I hang up. I glare at Jace.

"What the hell?" I demand.

"I just didn't want you to talk about the pranks again," Jace says and shrugs. He still keeps moving his hand on me and I don't feel like fighting against him. But unfortunately, he removes his hand from there and rolls his body on top of me. I don't really mind how heavy he feels now as I can feel how he's hard too. And then he starts moving against me.

"Do you think you could not do the pranks?" Jace asks.

"No," I breath out. I can feel how he tries to move away, but I grab his hips and he groans as I press him harder against me.

"Then I'm gonna get off if you will do the pranks." I don't know if he believes that himself, seeing as he's pushing his hips against mine.

"Okay, I won't do them," I say, but of course I will! I just really don't want him to go anywhere right now.

"Really?" I can see how easy it is to fool him now when we're both so turned on.

"Absolutely." Jace then decides to believe me and crashes his lips down to mine.

* * *

><p><strong>There's gonna be only one more chapter left. So, the next one is the last chapter.<strong>


	16. Chapter 16

Me and Jace have been in college for a year now. Everything has gone great between us. Well, of course there have been a few fights. And of course the girls have tried to flirt with the both of us, but have soon learned that we are together.

Clary arrived yesterday to study here too. She moved in with Sebastian next door. I can't wait for all he pranks I can do. I have such great ideas.

Jace is sleeping on our bed after a really hot and passionate sex. I put on my clothes. This is the perfect moment to do my first prank. Sebastian went to show Clary the new city and since Jace is asleep, he's not gonna be able to stop me. He would if he'd be awake. He's totally against this prank war.

I take my supplies with me and go to their apartment. Clary was stupid enough to give me a key in case she would forget hers or if I'd need it in some other case.

First thing I do is put pictures of the creepy girl from 'The Exorcist' all over the walls. Clary doesn't really like horror movies, but this one time when I was watching 'The Exorcist' she just decided that she'd give it a try. So, she watched it with me and when the movie ended, she was so pale. I asked if she was scared, but she denied it. She went to sleep to her room, but later that night she crawled into my bed.

Now, I know it's extremely mean to put those photos on the walls, but it's the revenge I need. After all, she did almost reveal to Jace how I felt about him with the porn. And not to mention the shock I got when she told me she was pregnant.

After I've put all the photos on the walls, I go to their bedroom. I put something on one of the drawers where I know Sebastian will probably find it and question her about it.

I leave the apartment with a satisfied and evil grin on my face.

Later I'm sitting on the couch and Jace is sitting next to me, his head on my shoulder. I hear footsteps and chatting coming from outside. They're back. The evil smirk spreads to my face.

"Why are you looking like that?" Jace asks worried.

I don't get a chance to answer as I hear a scream.

"Oh my god! Sebastian, take them off! Take them off!" I hear Clary yelling frantically. I can't help but start laughing loudly.

"What did you do?" Jace asks.

"What do you mean?" I manage between the laughing.

Suddenly there's loud, incessant knocking on the door. Jace walks to the door and opens it. Clary is looking so pissed off. Her face is almost as red as her hair, that's how mad she is. I start to laugh even more at the sight of her face and I feel like I can't breathe.

"Did you have to do that?! You know how scared I was of that movie!" she yells. Jace is looking so confused.

"You deserved it," I say after my laughter dies.

"No, I didn't! How am I supposed to sleep after that face imprinted on my mind?"

"You have Sebastian. And you definitely did deserve that, after the porn and the pregnancy prank." Clary seems to calm down a little as she thinks.

"Fine. So, maybe I did deserve that, but this is not over," she says madly and walks out of the apartment. Oh, this definitely is not over. Just wait and see.

* * *

><p>I'm lying on our bed, ready to go to sleep. That is if I'll be able to sleep. I can't believe Jonathan did that! I did kind of deserve it, but still.<p>

Sebastian is putting his clothes to his drawer.

"Um…" I hear him say as he stops to look inside the drawer.

"What?" I get off the bed and go stand beside him.

Sebastian takes something out of the drawer. He's holding a huge black dildo. I know immediately how it got there. I stand there in shock. How can he be so evil? First the photos, now this.

"What is this?" Sebastian asks, waving the huge dildo in front of me. "I thought I was big enough for you. But apparently-" I stop him before he can continue.

"That's not mine! Jonathan must have put it in there when he was here today."

"Are you sure?" he asks.

"Yes! How can you even think that you wouldn't be big enough for me?" I ask him incredulously. He grins at me.

"You're right. How could I possibly think that?"

"Besides, that would probably be too big for my body anyways." It's just so fucking huge. I mean, how can anyone possibly want to stick that into their body?

"I don't know. It could fit. Do you wanna try?" Sebastian asks with that incredibly sexy grin.

"No! I don't want to even try to put _that_ into me. And it would gross me out since my brother bought it."

"I guess you have a point. Let's go to sleep. You can confront Jonathan tomorrow."

I will. I have the perfect prank in my mind.

* * *

><p>The classes start again next week so me and Jace are enjoying our last moments of freedom. First we go to the movies and after that we go to this one restaurant we found a while ago. We eat dinner and have great time. When we finish eating, we decide to go back to our apartment.<p>

We go inside our apartment and Jace goes to use the bathroom that's attached to our bedroom. But too soon Jace comes back from the bedroom, looking extremely pale and shocked.

"What is it?" I ask and go closer to him. I stroke his arm gently. He's just shaking his head. I go to the bedroom and see the cause of his reaction.

Sitting on our bed is a human sized clown doll. It looks so fucking creepy. Even I'm a bit freaked out. But I'm more mad. Why did Clary have to drag Jace into this? No, wait. I did kind of bring Sebastian into this since I put that dildo in the drawer. I take that as they found it.

I go back to Jace who is sitting on the couch, still looking shocked. I sit beside him and put my hand on his shoulder.

"Are you mad at me?" I ask.

"No. I just don't think you should continue this prank war anymore." I turn his head to face me and give him a gentle kiss.

"Of course."

"Really? You don't need your revenge anymore?" he asks slightly angry.

"No. I don't want you to get dragged into this anymore." I stroke his hair and he smiles at me.

"Thank you." He kisses me. "Now go get rid of the doll," he says and shudders. I smile at him and go to our bedroom. I get the doll and go over to Clary's door. I knock on it and soon she opens it. She's grinning.

"Did you like your little surprise?" she asks and looks at the doll in my arms.

"Yes, Jace liked it very much," I growl at her and push the doll to her. She catches the heavy doll, stumbling a bit.

"I'm sure he did." She still has that fucking grin on her face.

"This has to end," I say sternly.

"Are you giving up?" she teases.

"No, I'm not giving up. I just don't want to drag Jace into this."

"Wow. He must really be scared of clowns."

"So what if he is? Just please, no more of this, okay?" She sighs.

"Fine. But he had it coming the minute you put that dildo in Sebastian's drawer," she says madly. So he _did_ find it.

"I thought you guys might want to make your sex life more interesting." She looks at me in disgust.

"You're gross," she says and closes the door on my face.

"Love you too," I yell through the door.

"Fuck off!" I hear her yelling. I chuckle and go back to make Jace feel better. If you know what I mean…

* * *

><p>That night me and Jace are just about to have sex. He's a panting mess below me as I'm stretching his tight hole, his cock rock hard. I take my fingers out of him and start to push my dick in.<p>

"Oh, Sebastian, right there!" I hear coming from the other side of the wall.

"No. No. I do not want to hear that," I complain. I rest my head on Jace's chest, my dick half buried inside him. "Make it stop," I whine to Jace as I continue hearing Clary's moans and Sebastian's growls.

"Oh, Fuck Jonathan! Just like that! Faster!" Jace yells and the noises stop. I start laughing and he's quick to follow. "So, now can you go back to fucking me?" Jace asks as our laughter dies down.

"After what I just heard? I don't think so." I still am hard and inside him. I just really want to push in, but I just keep hearing those very disturbing noises in my head.

"Are you sure?" Jace asks and lifts his hips, burying my cock more into him. I groan against his neck. In that moment I forget everything and start moving in and out of Jace.

* * *

><p>Jace and I are having a party at our place since today is the day we graduated from college. A lot of stuff has happened in these past two years. Jace and I got engaged. I got the courage and asked him.<p>

Clary and Sebastian are here right now with the rest of our friends. Magnus and Alec graduated also, but Simon and Isabelle still have one year left, like Clary. Sebastian graduated today too.

There are also some people I don't know in here, since Sebastian and Clary invited some of their friends form their classes. I'm sitting on the couch with Jace when suddenly some girl 'accidentally' stumbles into Jace's lap. I'm not even mad anymore. It amuses me how embarrassed they are after they find out that we're together.

"Oh, I'm so sorry!" the brunette apologizes, not sounding sincere at all.

"It's okay, but I would really appreciate if you'd get off my lap," Jace says politely.

"You look like that kind of guy who wants to have fun," she says seductively.

"I do have fun enough, thank you very much," Jace answers, glancing at me.

"Oh, but I can be so much more fun."

"I don't think you can. Or are you an incredibly gorgeous guy with white-blond hair who can fuck me all night?" Jace asks, raising an eyebrow. The girl looks confused. Then she looks at me. She bolts up from Jace like he's burning.

"I- I'm so sorry," she manages to say before she walks away. Jace and I burst out laughing.

"That never gets old," I say through our laughing.

"I know."

As our laughter dies, I edge closer to him. I wrap my arms around him and graze my lips against his ear.

"So, you like it when I can fuck you all night?" I ask in a low voice. I can feel Jace trembling a bit. I love how I can make him feel like that.

"Yes," he groans.

"Well, maybe we can then go to our bedroom and I can do just that." Jace's breathing is getting heavier.

"We can't. The guests are still here," he points out. I look around and see that he's right. Jace just sometimes makes me forget all this stuff.

"Oh, right. The guests," I say disappointed.

"I guess I have quite the effect on you too," Jace says amused. I turn to grin at him.

"Maybe you can show exactly what kind of effect you have, in the bedroom later," I say lowly.

"I like that idea very much."

So, we wait impatiently. Sometimes some of our friends or other guests come talk to us. By the end the party, I'm more than ready.

When the door closes and the last guests finally leave, I pull Jace up from the couch and drag him to the bedroom. I push him down on the bed and lie on top of him.

"I thought I was supposed to be in charge tonight," Jace breaths out.

"I'm not stopping you." I smirk down at him. He rolls us around so he's on top of me.

"Do you want me to fuck you all night?" Jace asks and starts grinding against me.

"Yes." He then connects his mouths with mine and kisses me fiercely. I love being in control, but I also like it very much when Jace takes control.

Soon we're both naked and he's pushing inside me. Little by little he slides in his hard cock and groans.

"Oh fuck," I growl.

Jace starts kissing me as he moves in and out slowly. We're both making noises against our mouths and Jace's pace gets faster. I involuntarily start lifting my lips, desperate to come.

"Are you gonna cum for me?" Jace asks, while thrusting hard and fast into me. I can't answer as in that moment my back arches from the bed and I come all over myself.

"Jace," I groan and it seems to trigger his orgasm since he pushes in once and I feel him coming inside me. He's still letting out small noises as he slumps down on top of me. I move my hands on his back as we continue lying like this.

"I think we should go to sleep. It's been a big day," I say and run my hand through Jace hair. He lifts his head and gives me a small kiss.

"You're right. But you did say that you wanted me to fuck you all night," he points out.

"That's right. Maybe we should do that instead. Maybe try different positions." I grin at him mischievously.

We fuck, or make love, for a long time after that. Not all night though. When we're ready to go to sleep, we curl up next to each other, still naked. We're face to face and we're holding each other tightly. I feel very content and satisfied.

"I love you," Jace says and I can definitely see it in his eyes.

"You showed me that pretty well tonight," I say, smirking at him. "And I love you too," I add hastily.

We kiss for a moment and then turn the lights off. I fall asleep in the arms of my man, who will always also be my best friend. And he will always be in my life. I'll make sure of that.

* * *

><p><strong>So this is the end. And I'm a bit sad. But I'm also happy that I finished this. Thank you all so much who read, reviewed, followed or favorited the story :)<strong>


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